But to lift my arms up means I have to uncover my breasts. That’s exactly what Luca wants.
I look him right in the eye and before I even realize what I’m doing, I lift my arms up and Luca lowers the silky nightgown onto me. It feels like wearing a cloud.
“I’ll be dressing you from now on,” he says. “Feeding you. Doing these things for you.”
“And if I say no?”
“You can say no all you want, Nina. But we’re doing this. Tell me you hated what we just did.”
How can I answer him? I feel strange and uncomfortable but also… relaxed. Luca is stating he is going to take care of me. Even though I’m not sure I’m ok with him dressing and feeding me, I do like that he seems concerned about my well-being. Susanna never was.
“I can’t,” I whisper. “I can’t say I hated it. But I can’t say I liked it either.”
All Luca does is give me that self-satisfied smirk of his.
And all I can do is blush, knowing this is the man I am married to.
I’m expected to sleep next to Luca. He acts like it’s not a big deal whereas for me, it’s too much to even fathom.
“You can get in the bed,” he says, under the covers, looking at me with amusement. “I won’t bite.”
He changed into sleep pants and nothing else so his bare chest is on display for me. I keep taking peeks at him but I can’t look for long.
“I’m not sure I can,” I admit, standing beside the bed, stiff as a board.
“You’re going to need to sleep at some point.”
“I can just sleep in another one of the rooms. You have, like, four of them.”
“But you’re my wife. You will sleep in the same bed as me, Nina. It’s what I want and it’s what you need to get used to. I’m not going to sleep in a different bed as my wife.”
“But couples sleep in different beds all the time. For some of them, it’s the reason they’re marriage is able to function.” I twist my hands together. Luca settles his eyes right onto the gesture. Immediately, I drop my hands to my sides.
“Maybe for other marriages, that is true. But for us, we’re going to sleep in the same bed. I will pick you up and tuck you in if you don’t get in the bed right this moment.”
I know he will too. He’s already fed and dressed me like I’m a baby.
With a sigh, I get under the covers. Luca is warm and big beside me. His presence is almost too much to bear.
“You’re awkward around men,” he observes.
“I can’t help it. You’re my husband yet, you’re still a stranger.”
“Then we should rectify that. What do you want to know about me?”
I stare at him in shock. “You really want to talk?”
“Why wouldn’t I?” he asks with a shrug. “I don’t want you to be a stranger either. What do you want to know about me?”
I think on it for a moment. I have to make this moment count. Luca is open right now but will he be that way forever? “How long have you worked for the mafia?”
“All my life. I was born into it. My father was a mafia man, just like yours was.”
“So, we were both born to this life.” That makes me feel slightly better. Without even realizing, I find myself sinking closer to him in the bed.
“What else? I’m sure you have more questions.”
I hesitate. There is a question I want to ask but I’m too afraid.
