He steps closer. “Won’t you give your fiancé a goodbye kiss?”
I raise an eyebrow. “You mean the ‘forced fiancé’ I only want to kick?”
He chuckles. “People even give goodbye kisses to their enemies.”
“I’m not among those people,” I reply, giving him the sweetest fake smile.
He inhales slowly through his mouth. “So you’re going to keep me waiting for four months?”
I shake my head. “The whole life.”
He laughs. My mouth twitches as I try to hold back a smile.
His laughter fades. He stares at me, his intense gaze sending a shiver of unease from my head to my toes. In a thick, low voice, he says, “I will miss you.”
I want to say,I won’t miss you, just to mock him, but I’m not the kind of person who hurts someone’s feelings, especially not by lying. I’m better than Matleon. I can’t toy with his emotions.
I nod, then turn, leaving him standing there.
chapter 18
Iselyn
“What are you doing here, Lyn?” Mom’s voice comes from behind me.
I rub my hands to shake off the soil, most of it falls, though some has stubbornly stuck. I turn toward her. “Adding some manure to the calendula,” I say.
“Come inside, it’s very cold out, and why aren’t you wearing gloves?” Mom tries her best to look mad, but as always, she only looks cute with her frown.
I follow her inside, chuckling. I wash my hands before heading to the living room, where Mom is now gently scolding Papa about my activities.
We live in a small countryside village, Turgenevo, in a modest house with just two rooms, a living room and a kitchen. Behind it is Nana Irina’s cottage, and beside our house is a guesthouse Dad built later. Whenever my uncles or cousins visit, they stay there.
“There are only two days left until her wedding, and look at her! How good will the bride look with soil under her nails?” Mom exclaims.
Papa chuckles at Mom’s fussing. I sit beside him, checking my nails. There’s indeed a bit of soil. “Don’t worry, Mom. Tomorrow, Vina will do my manicure.”
Tomorrow we leave for Vladivostok. The wedding will take place in Mikhailov Palace. My gut tightens as the realization of how few days remain sinks in.
Papa notices the change in my expression and pats my cheek. “Everything will be fine,” he reassures me.
I give him a smile that doesn’t reach anywhere near my eyes.Of course, everything will be fine, except my life.
I’m going to marry that psychopath, and I’m not even sure what his emotions or feelings for me truly are. Everybody claims he loves me a lot, but I know that isn’t true. He may be interested in me for now, but there’s no guarantee he’ll still be interested after a year. And I’m terrified that I’ll fall for him again, only to have my heart shattered all over again.
I take a deep breath, steeling my resolve.I’m not going to love him. I’ll make his life hell, make him realize he doesn’t want me, and then make him divorce me. He’s forcing me into this marriage, and I’ll force him to walk out of it.
My heart will be safe as long as it stays away from Matleon. There is no other man who can make it beat the way he can, and no other man who can crush it the way he can. I’ve experienced his charm and his cruelty far too closely, and I’m not strong enough to go through that again without losing myself.
Mom’s voice pulls me out of the maze of my thoughts.
“Are you not happy with the marriage, Lyn?”
She’s asked me this question many times, and every time, I give the same answer.
“I’m happy,” I say softly. “I just don’t want to leave you both.”
Papa caresses my head. “You can come to see us anytime. But is that the only reason you’ve been looking so troubled lately?”
