“Are you getting out?” He held the door for me, and I mindlessly stepped past him. I wanted out. Out of this life I trapped myself in.
Chapter Ten
Emily
“You’re such a Goody Two-Shoes. You don’t know anything about struggle. What it is like to be popular.” My sister curled her brown hair with one hand while touching up her mascara with the other. I made a comment about how that didn’t seem safe, and apparently that was enough to provoke her.
“Chastine, all I said was that what you’re doing looked unsafe.” I sighed, not wanting to fight again. After uncurling her hair, she pointed the tip at me.
“You think you know everything. You’re almost thirty, and what do you have to show for it? When I’m your age, I’ll have everything. A husband who spoils me, money so I don’t have to live in a dump like this.” She inched closer, like she would take that iron to my skin. And for once in the time we’d lived together, I feared her. She would do it. Just to hurt me.
“Chastine, what happened? We used to get along. I’m just trying to make the best of this situation and be here for you. Give you a home with someone who cares about you.” Despite the trembling in my legs, I stepped forward. Her blue eyes softened for the barest of seconds, and I smiled. Which was apparently the worst thing I could have done. Instead of poking me with the curling iron like I feared, she threw it like a javelin straight at my face.
“Little Aemilia, so soft. Your mother thought you were soft, and so did mine. You don’t have what it takes in this world. You should be put out like the other weaklings.” She stood tall and grabbed my wrists. I stood there, mouth open. She pushed back my sleeves and laughed. I ripped my hands away, and every word stuck in my throat. “Wish it wasn’t just for show.”
She thought my scars, my struggles with my mind, were for show?
“Yeah, I see it in your eyes. You think I’m a monster. Well, guess what, sis, I’m a monster, and fucking proud. I can’t wait until I’m old enough for my parents’ money. Then I’m out of here.” She laughed and went right back to applying her makeup. Like I was nothing to her, and the truth of that hit me deep. I turned around, grabbed my purse, and left. Even if she burnt the apartment down, which may happen with the curling iron still hot, she would survive. Chastine had a life to live, boys’ hearts to break, and kind people to make cry. She wouldn’t go down in something as simple as a fire.
I couldn’t believe I just stood there and allowed it all to happen. Stupid freeze response. I knew from my studies what it was, but it didn’t make me feel better. I was soft, maybe even too soft. My arms itched and I rubbed my skin vigorously back and forth. I needed something. Someone. I shouldn’t be alone. I grabbed my phone only to stall with my finger over the contacts list. Selene was busy. She had a toddler and jobs and a husband. She also suffered, and I couldn’t drag her down with me.
Logically, I knew Selene would be fine, but I just couldn’t have my best friend know how bad things had gotten with my sister. That I allowed her to treat me that way and did nothing. I thought about writing to Vincent. He’d understand, but instead of walking to the park, I found myself in front of Pizza Pazza. Selene and I ate here a few times. The pizza was great, and something about the place made me feel ok.
“Emily. Good to see you again.” Phillip, one of the heroes I met during the dead apocalypse, opened the door with a kind smile on his face.
“Uh, hi. Phillip.” I stepped into the restaurant and glanced around for Selene. The heroes liked to hang out together.
“Just me. I was grabbing some food and saw you outside. I ordered a stuffed crust with sausage and mushrooms; wanna join me?” With the mention of my favorite pizza, I nodded and followed him to the table where a fresh-out-of-the-oven pizza sat.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you knew I was coming,” I joked, and the corner of his lips tilted up an inch. We dug in at the same time, and I ate quietly. I didn’t know Phillip that well, so I wouldn’t be dumping all my issues on him. But I did feel better knowing I wasn’t alone.
“You’re a very calming person; has anyone ever mentioned that?” he asked, and I nodded with a mouthful.
“Yeah. It’s the reason they hired me at the hospital. I’m good at soothing the patients.” I tried to be calm, and usually it helped. I liked that feeling of being there for people.
“Do you ever think it was more than your training?” He grabbed another slice, and my face pinched together.
“Um, no. I’ve always been this way.” Except with my family. Wish I could calm my sister down. I chomped on the cheesy crust and thought of the things I knew about Phillip.
“How’s everything going with you? Your sister is pregnant, right? You’re gonna be an uncle; that’s exciting.” Selene mentioned something about Rose a few weeks ago. Poor Rose had the power to feel and influence others’ emotions. With her emotions on a constant rollercoaster, her husband took her to their cabin in the woods where no one else lived.
“Everything is always right in my world, and I am hella excited to be an uncle. We’re gonna have a lot of fun.” His eyes glazed over and his smile brightened. I wished I could feel that happy right now.
“That’s great,” I spoke between bites of my second slice.
“It truly is. I couldn’t have asked for a better family than her, Draco, and the heroes.” His focus shifted to me, and I couldn’t fake a smile or a nod.
“It sounds nice. I’m glad you have that.” People who cared, who wanted you happy, who held your hand on your hard days. I’d seen the heroes interact together, and they were a family. A found family.
“You’re part of the family too.” I laughed and shook my head, instantly dismissing his statement.
“You bunch are always kind to me when Selene brings me around, but no. I’m not like you all. I’m just—”
“One of us,” he declared with his whole chest. I stood and wiped my mouth with a napkin.
“I appreciate the kindness, and the pizza. But I’m already having a shitty day; I don’t need you rubbing in my wounds that I don’t fit in, ok? We can be friends and all, but I’m not really one of you.” I grabbed my purse and quickly marched to the door.
“Emily, wait.” He moved so silently I wasn’t aware of his hand on my wrist until the whole restaurant vanished.
