Hope for a future that I’d never seen for myself. One where I was free to be me. A future where I was with someone and felt like I was enough for both myself and for him. There was no need to conquer the world with him by my side. We were the only world we needed. We were enough.
I was scared shitless and didn’t manage to nap for the two hours I’d planned to do before giving up and getting dressed for Sunday dinner. I wanted to call Logan and tell him what I’d discovered inside myself, but I was afraid. I shouldn’t be. He wouldn’t judge me—that I knew.
“No, he wanted me to talk to him when I was going crazy, and this falls under that category,” I told myself as I stared at my reflection.
“But what if it freaks him out, and he doesn’t want to see me again?
“Well, he is under contract to help you sort your shit out.
“Yeah. But I think I’m gonna keep this one to myself until I really understand it.
I shook my head, feeling like a nut bag for having a talk with myself like the woman in the mirror was another person. It was like that scene fromTheLord of the Ringscome to life.
Snickering, I leaned in closer to the reflection.
“We want Mia’s precious.” I tried changing my voice to sound more like the creature from the films and then ran away from the bathroom, laughing at myself. At least I found myself hilarious again. I’d missed being weird with myself. I mean, if you couldn’t be weird by yourself, then who could you be weird with?
I opened the door and left, feeling a lightness on my shoulders despite realizing I was falling for Logan. I’d cross that bridge when I got there. For now, I was going to go eat and hang out with my crazy family, who loved me for who I was, exactly as I was now.
