Those who remained of the army on my side raised their fists in victory.
“We won’t ever give up. Remember that, Dorian,” Echo called out. She was completely bare, her body covered in dirt and blood after having fought in her animal’s forms. Asher was by her side, but there was blood rushing down his head. He would survive; I’d seen it. So would she.
They looked down at their fallen comrades. Phillip’s sister was lying on the ground, eyes closed, hands resting on her bleeding stomach, where Draco had placed them gently after she died.
Leon and Lilith were embraced together on the grass. She had sacrificed herself to save his good soul from going to hell, damning them both to perish together. At least they had that.
Everything was playing out as the future had shown me, but something didn’t feel right. Something was wrong, and I couldn’t figure it out.
Phillip rushed to Draco’s side and pulled out the sword in one quick motion, blood pouring out from his wound. When I’d seen this in my vision, I had hoped it would hurt. Watching it now only made a grimace grace my lips.
Still, I tried to continue the course I’d chosen.
“You chose wrong, Griffin, and you lost everything.” I stared at him, speaking with no venom in my words like I should have had.
“You never deserved the love she gave you,” Phillip said, but he didn’t lunge at me like he had in my vision.
“What did you do?” I was at a complete loss. I was aching inside my body, not in the physical way but deeper, in my soul, if I had one.
Phillip stood and faced me.
“You’re realizing you loved Esme.”
I shook my head. No, I wasn’t. Esme and I had a short moment together, a passing star in the night sky. Bright and beautiful, but was over quickly.
“You loved her and lost her, as Draco has lost my sister. She died in your arms, though you pushed it far back into your mind until seeing them together. Hearing Rose take her last breath brought out those repressed feelings. You’re feeling Esme’s love, and you’re feeling the loss of that love.” Phillip was standing his ground.
“I didn’t love her!” I roared.
But even I felt it was a lie now. I’d found love where it wasn’t supposed to be, it was right in front of me the whole time.
“It doesn’t matter. There’s nothing we can do now. Let’s be done.” I tried hard to push back the feelings of regret and sorrow that were trying to consume me.
“It’s not done, Dorian. We can change it. We can change it all. Bring them all back.” I looked at him like he’d lost his mind. Losing his sister had made him go mad. His words were impossible.
Even the gods hadn’t liked to play with bringing people back from the dead. It never ended well.
“Give it up, Griffin. Mourn your dead and be free.” I started to walk away when his next words stopped me.
“You could have a second chance with her. To love her.” His eyes were pleading me to take a leap on whatever he was trying to sell me.
I couldn’t help myself as I tilted my head and looked up at the stars that were peeking through the false night sky.
She would see me as a monster if she was here. But would she still love me? If it were possible to change things, would she still love me after all I’ve done? I didn’t think so.
I kept walking, my heart hurting with the knowledge that I was choosing for things to stay as they were in fear that she’d no longer love the villain who’d killed her friends and took away the light, despite my revelation of my own love.
“Stop running away from your feelings! Help me change the Fates’ design, Dorian. Help me bring them back!” I kept moving.
“Why do you fight it? Why won’t you give in?” he yelled while stomping after me. I’d had enough.
“Because I love her!” I yelled.
“I loved her, and I don’t wanna see that look in her eyes now that it’s too late.”
Movement from behind Phillip caught my eye. Draco was healed and moving toward us. His eyes weren’t filled with hate—instead they beamed with hope. He would move mountains to be with Rose again; he would do anything to hold her in his arms.
I felt shame for the first time in so long.
What was I willing to do to have Esme again?
