Page 28 of Day

Chapter Fourteen

Lilith

Every eye was on me as I danced.

Dancing was my outlet—my place to just let all the warring emotions and memories out of my head.

Right now I was feeling a bit emotional, both happy and sad.

Leon was going to kiss me; I saw it in his eyes. But I couldn’t do it. Instead I kissed his nose, hopped off his lap and told him I needed to go to work, that I’d see him tomorrow.

He was going through a lot, with almost dying and all. Add in my emotional baggage, and he was willing to lay down his lips on mine so I would forget about my past. But it wasn’t the right time. He didn’t truly want to kiss me, and until then, my lips would be sealed.  Hopefully, if all went according to plan, it wouldn’t be that long.

So to my place I went, to shower and change into proper dancing attire, and then walked to work.

The owner, Benny, let me do whatever I wanted at his club. I’d helped him get evidence on his cheating wife a year ago, so he let me come in and dance whenever, and paid me a healthy wage. I got to dance, and no one could touch me. Perfect scenario. If I stopped coming, he wouldn’t stress about it, since I came and went as I pleased. He hadn’t seen me since that night with Leon, and when I passed him at the bar he didn’t even blink. Cage dancers were not the main attraction of the club; they were the props that kept the vibe of dancing alive and well.

But as I danced, I realized things had changed for me since the last time. I no longer cared if men’s eyes were on me. I used to live for the thrill of owning them with the twists of my hips. Instead of feeling sad about that new attitude, I smiled up at the ceiling and laughed. My hands gripped the top of the cage, and I lifted myself up. All I wanted was to dance. Everyone else in this club could go fuck themselves. I had what I wanted, and it wasn’t their eyes.  I was so caught up in the rhythm that I didn’t realize someone was standing next to my cage, waiting to chat.

When my eyes collided with his, I didn’t even stop moving. Not worth my time.

“Lilith.” His voice was like ink being poured over my insides. I should have killed him when I had the chance.

“I miss the sway of your body,” he purred, and instantly that made me want to stop moving, but that would only give him the satisfaction of getting to me. Which I wouldn’t let him see. He couldn’t touch me, and I couldn’t touch him.

“What do you want, Ezra?” I turned to look him in the eye while shifting my body from side to side slowly with the beat.

“Word is, you’ve caught the attention of somebody bad. I’ve come to check on you, Lilith. Despite our current situation, I’ve never stopped caring.”

His tall frame leaned against the cage. Age never seemed to faze him like it did others. Those emerald-green eyes, combined with the perfectly gelled salt-and-pepper hair, made Ezra a lethal silver fox.  He was still in incredible shape, and I knew that shape with all its tattoos very well.

Despite our history, there was always a part of me that wanted his comfort. There were moments in all the chaos where that was the only thing I craved. Then I grew up, and saw him for the monster he truly was.

“Meow,” I purred and wiggled like a cat to the song, letting him know I was done talking to him without telling him to fuck off.

“That mouth.” His fingers reached past the bars to touch my lips with his poisonous hands.

“Such pleasure.”

Before his god-awful hand could reach me, I snapped at him with my teeth like a feral animal. I’d rip those fingers off and spit them back in his face, if I could.

“Such spirit. Goodnight, my little bird.” He smiled at me coldly, and then walked away in his expensive suit.

Night officially ruined.

God, I hated that man. Ezra Alistair was the devil, and I had been his little demon doll for too long.

I waited until I knew he was gone from the area before leaving my cage, grabbing my purse, and walking home. I needed a shower, and then who knew. But right now the zombies in my head were all clinging to the fence that held them in, threatening to knock it right down and rain hell over my brain.

As soon as I closed the door behind me to my home, I shucked my clothes off on the way to the shower.  With the water as hot as I could handle, I jumped in and scrubbed every part of my skin that his eyes caressed.

The washcloth had done its job, but I still felt gross. Everything was coming back into the forefront of my head, and I couldn’t do anything but shrink to the ground and put my hands to my head, hoping to keep everything inside.

Hands. Blood. Screams. Bird.

I screamed and started thrashing around, as if it were happening all over again. Despite my eyes being open, it was like I wasn’t even in my own home anymore. I ran from the water’s spray and started destroying everything I could touch.  I wouldn’t ever be used again.

“Fight back!” I screamed at my memories as I demolished everything I had.

“Fight back!”  I cursed until I collapsed on the floor and let my lungs settle, allowing the memories to leak out of my head in the form of tears down my cheeks.

After a few minutes, I started murmuring my motto that slowly patched the wall to protect my sanity.

“Firebirds rise, firebirds fly.”

I repeated the words until I felt my mind calm and my body relax against the carpet.

“Firebirds rise, firebirds fly.”  My eyes closed, and I let myself fall to the seduction of sleep.

Tomorrow I would rise, and bask in the daylight.