“Avoiding the issue isn’t going to make it go away, baby.” Kate tried to make me understand, but I was starting to close my mind to all ideas for the moment.
We ate dinner, while I listened to the girls tell me about their writing and upcoming releases. Writing was something I was never good at; I was more the artsy type.
“Has that dick of an ex tried to see you since you came back?” Meghan asked while chewing on a bite of pizza. I sighed in annoyance.
“Yeah, he’s tried. But I’ve successfully avoided him.” Lane has been calling constantly and even showed up at the house a few times, obviously not getting the hint. Kate’s husband edged out of the room, obviously trying to get away from the girl gab, and Kate was waiting to jump on me with more questions.
“Tell me about the sex with the trucker. I need some good stories for my books. Was he a dirty talker? Tie you up? Take your ass?” I felt my cheeks turn beet red.
“Oh, truck yes. Look at that face.” Kate had taken to my “truck yes” slogan. Meghan was giggling and clapping her hands.
“I agree with Kate. We need some deets.”
I rolled my eyes, but proceeded to tell them some of the glorious details. We didn’t keep anything from each other.
“Oh, fuck me.” Kate would mutter here and there, and Meghan would simply fan herself when I went into explicit detail.
At the end of the night, we all settled down to watchAce Ventura: Pet Detective, since Meghan hadn’t seen it, and Kate and I really thought that was a crime we should have punished her for. So we forced her to sit and watch Ace do his thing.
Right before bed, I held my phone in my hands, staring at Killian’s message, like I did almost every night. I missed him so much. It was almost like our whole trip was a dream, and not something that really happened. But like every night, I couldn’t make myself do it. I had to figure myself out first before I tried to make things work with him. I knew it deep in my bones that it was the only way things could work.
“You really think my graphic design was good?” I asked Meghan. We were sharing a bed in Kate’s spare bedroom.
“Yeah, it was really great.” She yawned and rolled over to go to sleep.
I looked up at the ceiling and listened to her breathing level out as she fell asleep.
“Tomorrow, Livia, you’re going to work towards who you want to be.” I smiled to myself, feeling like I was finally heading in the right direction.
Chapter Thirty
Killian
“Don’t know why you dragged me out here.” I took a sip of the beer in my hand and looked around the bar Joel had forced me to.
“You need to get out,” he replied and eyed the women that had surrounded us, plausibly picking out who he would be taking home tonight. That made me so glad his house was large, so I wouldn’t hear whatever noises he and his lady would be making.
“I’m fine,” I lied.
“Okay. Then since you’re perfectly fine, go find a chick to bring home.” He was calling my bluff, and he would win. I couldn’t think of any woman but mine. Then the fact settled in that she wasn’t really mine anymore.
I shrugged, and he smiled.
“Have you checked in on her? Made sure she’s doing all right?” he prodded, and my head shook no. If I started talking to her, there wouldn’t be anything that would stop me from going after her.
“I still think you should. Might help.” He was trying to help me, like he’d been doing since I called to tell him she left to go home. He flew to my house, when he knew I would be arriving, just so I would have some company. But then he had to get home and sign some papers for that movie, so I tagged along, doing anything I could so I wouldn’t think of her all hours of the day. So far that plan failed, but I was still going with it.
“Hello, lips.” Joel’s voice and shocked face made me scan the crowd for who he had his eyes set on. Tall, deeply tanned skin, dark hair, and light eyes. Definitely his type. She was looking around, found my eyes, looked me up and down, and then moved over to Joel. Her cheeks tinged with pink, and that all but sealed her night with Joel. He was on the move toward her in an instant. I watched as he put the moves on her, and she just stood there, not throwing herself at him. Odd. Only other person who wasn’t into him was Livia. My Livia.
I heard the smack from across the room. Joel was just shut down by the sultry woman. He walked back toward me, stunned, her handprint on his face.
“Have fun?” I actually smiled at him, getting a kick out of the fact she smacked his pretty, movie star face.
“Chick’s got spunk. Made my dick hard.” He downed a shot and then his eyes found her as she continued to walk around, looking at every guy in the bar. She was on the hunt, and by the looks of it, wasn’t willing to take a try at any of the men here.
“Be right back,” Joel said, excusing himself, walking toward the little stage with the DJ that had been playing music for a man doing karaoke. When he came back, he had a mischievous look on his face.
“What’d you do?” The words were out, and he looked like he was about to answer, but then a swarm of girls latched onto his arms, his waist, anywhere they could. I rolled my eyes at their pawing.
