“Yeah?” My voice was hoarse, and I refused to look him in the eye. Although staring at the light dusting of hair on his chest, and following the line of dark blond hair that travelling into his rolled-down wetsuit, wasn’t any better. It was probably way worse.
“You did good out there. You’re a natural on the water.” He was complimenting me! My mouth parted, and somehow I mumbled my thanks to him. Even though we both know I sucked out there.
“You’ll have to keep practicing. Anything that is worth your passion is worth the time it takes to make it happen.” With those words hanging in the air, he closed the door and left me standing in the hallway, mouth parted, and heart blooming.
That was the nicest thing he’d ever said to me. Suddenly I yearned for his words. I wanted nothing more than for him to tell me a story, to just open up and let me in. He was so much more than what met the eye, and I was becoming addicted to finding out about that inner man.
Chapter Eleven
Livia
After finding my feet in the hallway, I fled to my room and threw a slouchy sweater over my head, then braided my hair so it fell over my exposed shoulder.
A flash of silver caught my eye from my bag. I totally hadn’t looked at my phone once since before getting in the truck with Killian. I’d turned it off and told myself not to use it unless I needed it. Surprisingly, I was doing well with that. But I should probably check it to make sure everyone was all right. Mom and Dad didn’t really approve of my journey, but they understood it. Although they didn’t know my plans had changed, and now I was riding along with a trucker. I’m guessing they might not like that so much.
My fingers pressed the button on the side of the smart phone, and I watched it come to life.
Ten missed calls.
Twenty-three missed messages. Good grief.
I opened up the messenger and read the first few from Lane:
“Livie, I forgive you for what you did. Let’s just forget it happened and come home.”
“Liv baby, call me, where are you?”
“Your parents just told me you went on a road trip by yourself, are you crazy? You can’t handle being by yourself. Come home, Livia.”
“I miss you in my arms at night. Come back to me, Liv baby.”
I hit delete on all the others, not even wanting to see them. He forgave me for what I did? I huffed just thinking about that and moved on to who called.
Lane
Mom
Dad
Mom
Karen, my “sort of” friend.
Dr. Janice’s office.
My eyes were glued to that contact name. Dr. Janice called. It had been so long that I forgot that I had been to them. It had been, what, a month? I’d had so much going on in my life that I had completely forgotten about them. My hands were starting to shake, and I was feeling afraid—too afraid to call right now. What if they told me what I had been thinking? I would be devastated. But what if they told me things were okay? I would be fine. Elated, actually.
I stared at the call back button, and I didn’t know what to do. This call would be life-changing. I was so nervous and terrified that I just put the phone back in my bag and walked away. I wasn’t ready to hear what Dr. Janice had to say. Maybe later, before going to bed, or at least after I’ve had some alcohol in my system.
Joel was just answering the door when I came down the stone stairs.
“Hey, you did good out there. You guys will have to come visit again so you can keep practicing.” You guys. He said it like there was a future between Killian and me. There wasn’t.
“Thanks, I’ll think about it.” I winked at him, trying to get out of my freaked state of mind. He got us set up at the kitchen table, and Killian came down dressed in his signature thermal shirt and jeans. This time he was barefoot, which I found strangely attractive, and his sleeves were pushed back to the elbows, showing off his intricate tattoos.
Joel talked more about his upcoming film. You could see from his face that he was excited, and I loved seeing that much passion from someone for their job.
After dinner, Killian wanted to go to the grocery store, so we all went together and got lots of fresh food for our next journey in the truck. Joel wore a hat and glasses, to help us from being mobbed as we walked around, and for the most part it helped. Only a couple of people recognized him and wanted to take a picture. I couldn’t imagine going through that everywhere you went. We made it back to the house without a hitch, and put the groceries in the fridge. Feeling like I was crashing from denial of all the issues in my life, I took off my shoes and decided to walk along the shore. Joel and Killian sat outside, drinking beers and talking about man things. I wanted to join them, but I was feeling blue. They probably had enough going on, and didn’t need to hear about my problems. As I watched the sky start to turn dark, I knew I couldn’t put off listening to the message that was going to change me one way or another.
