“So what, he said he’d love to do a shot with you sometime and said that Steele or Garrett was getting some hot ass?”
“Something like that,” Tara said with a smile. “But the point is, Katie, I think Connor has something going on from the past that’s affecting him.”
“He made mention about Long Beach being full of assholes,” I said. “So maybe it’s something to do with that?”
Tara shrugged.
“Katie, do you really like this guy?”
“No, he was a dick—”
“I’m not asking you so that you can give me an answer. I’m asking rhetorically.”
In other words, shut the hell up and let her talk.
“If you like him, you’re going to have to give him time and space to open up, more than any of us had to do with our guys,” she said. “Even Brock needed time to tell me everything, and I’d argue he’s the most emotionally mature of all of them. The fact that Connor even told you that he felt Long Beach was full of assholes is telling. He certainly hasn’t mentioned that to any of us otherwise.”
“Interesting.”
“But you’ve got to figure out the dance between probing to learn more and knowing when to back off,” she said. “When you went for a kiss, it was probably too much for him. He’d probably already shared so much and was looking for an out. And he probably figured that if he kissed you, he wouldn’t get out.”
I guess it made sense. It just sounded like an awfully detailed explanation for a guy that liked to fight and sported a bunch of tattoos. Guys like that generally didn’t carry a lot of complexity.
But, then again, I’d met other guys like that and had never felt attraction to them. Maybe there was something with Connor that I didn’t even consciously know of that I could not help but feel attraction. Maybe Tara was right.
“Just wish he wasn’t a dick about it,” I said.
“He was a dick not because he disliked you,” Tara said, “but because he couldn’t handle the moment. Maybe even himself.”
“I guess.”
But it didn’t much change how I thought about how I’d handle him. I wasn’t planning on reaching out for now. If Connor wanted a second date, he had to show some initiative. I was willing to break a lot of rules for what the guy did first, but if I’d done the first date and long-established interest before then, I wasn’t going to also ask him for a second date. I’d shown my interest enough; he needed to reciprocate at some point.
I was dogged and persistent, but I refused to be desperate.
“But either way, Katie, I just want to make sure you’re OK,” Tara said. “I came here to check on you, not to give you a psychological profile of Connor.”
“Even though you did both,” I said with a laugh. “I’ll be fine. I appreciate you coming over here. Probably saved me from murdering some customers.”
“Wow, that’s a first.”
“I said probably, not definitely,” I added with a smile. “I still have to yell at the occasional dick in here. You know gas stations are some of the most stolen from places.”
Tara shook her head, but she was finally doing it with a smile again.
“I swear, you need to come back to the white-collar world and get a real job.”
“And what, give up on myself? I have more resiliency than that,” I said as I felt my phone buzz in my pocket, indicating I had a new text. “And besides, you know that I’m too blunt for the real world. I’d get fired within two weeks for calling my boss a moron.”
“That is very much true,” Tara said. “Anyway, much as I would love to talk to you all day—”
“The gas station down the street is for sale. We could make a monopoly and just talk all day.”
“—I like having a real job and not dealing with assholes who want to rob me all day,” she continued. “So! Text me if you need anything. You good?”
“I am now,” I said.
“All right,” Tara said, grabbing a candy bar and throwing me two bucks to pay for it. “Now I’ve been a customer at your store today. Let me know if you want to do anything this upcoming weekend.”
