I swallowed it all, licked my lips, and sat back on my legs, satisfied with the work I had done. Michael just laid on the couch, groaning and still unable to speak. I’d sit there and look at that man all night if I could. It wasn’t a question of hot or attractive.
It was both.
“Fuck... you know, you want to know something honest?”
Those words might have scared me in a bunch of other contexts, but with Michael, somehow, it felt like I was about to hear something good.
“Sure.”
Michael smiled.
“I wanted to kiss you, but I didn’t want to have sex with you yet,” he said. “I want this to go deeper than that. I don’t... I don’t know what to call it, other than me liking you, but I think we could have something real.”
It was sweet to hear, and it was something that I one hundred percent agreed with. I wasn’t naive enough to think this was going to develop into something special just because we’d done this once, but I did know that this was unlike anything I had experienced in a long, long time—and I wasn’t referring to orgasm.
I closed my eyes and eventually fell asleep on him. I didn’t know when exactly. But I just knew that as I drifted off, I felt as comfortable next to a man as I had in long, long time.
Patriot
Ihad a lot of mixed feelings when I woke up the next day far earlier than I normally did.
Whenever I thought about her arm resting across my body, why I had no pants on, or the gentle breathing of Kaitlyn by my side, I felt incredibly happy. I hadn’t articulated this exact thought the night before, knowing that it would just scare her off, but no one had made me feel so comfortable and at ease since Jennifer. There was just something about her that made me feel at ease.
But unfortunately, as soon as the circle of thought extended beyond the couch and to other people, it became a haphazard mess.
The thought about not being able to trust Lane had, unfortunately, wormed its way deep into my mind, and I was not able to shake it. It was stupid, of course. Lane was my best friend, perhaps the only person worthy of the title “friend” in the Black Reapers... but if it was that stupid, why had it stuck around?
And if I could not trust Lane, then who the hell could I trust in the club? In my life? If I couldn’t trust my best friend, why would I suddenly be able to trust older members that I didn’t know at all?
As I thought about it, I realized how ridiculous it sounded. Lane had undergone such a radical transformation in the last few weeks, becoming more involved, willing to put his life on the line. It would have been much easier for him to just fake it and eventually sell everyone out for murder and some blood money later.
And yet...
I need to talk to Lane. I need to make sure things are fine. If nothing else...
Fucking hell. I can’t believe I’m having these thoughts. But I am. I absolutely am.
I stood up, put my boxers and jeans on, and started to make some coffee and breakfast. I was dead tired and craved going back to the couch, but the power of doubt had won out over the power of dreams.
About five minutes into making my meal, I heard Kaitlyn stirring on the couch, gently moaning as she awoke. I stole a glimpse of her, looking so beautiful on the couch. Call it selfish or just silly, but I wanted her to come to me, in a half-awake state, and just hold me. I wanted to feel valued. I wanted to feel her arms around me.
Seconds later, I got my wish. Her arms went around my shoulders, and she planted a gentle, tender kiss on my cheek.
“How are you?” I said as I flipped some bacon.
“Mmm.”
It was all she could muster before she kissed me again on the cheek.
“If you want some coffee, there’s some about to be ready right over there.”
Kaitlyn scratched my arm in response, too sleepy to say anything in full English. I understood the feeling.
She poured herself a cup and took a few sips. It was like watching the curtain on a theatrical stage slowly start to rise—her eyes became more alert, looked up more, and her lips curved up along with that imaginary curtain.
“I haven’t slept like that in a long, long time,” she said. “What are you going to do today? I have off, you know.”
I had my suspicions that this was an invitation to stay in all day and fool around. I certainly wouldn’t have said no to that under a lot of circumstances, even if last night the release from her mouth was enough to prevent me from going straight to sex too quickly.
