Cody pushes past me and my gaze falls onto his phone. As he turns around, I go to grab it but he turns back. I almost slip over but I manage to grab the rail just in time.
‘We’ve got a fish, Daddy.’
Cody reaches over Millie to help tackle the mackerel that is dangling on the shiny-ended rod. Swiftly I grab his phone and press a button. It’s an older phone and it isn’t locked. I quickly see if he has the Facebook app but I can’t log in. As Cody comes back with a fish and throws it in the bucket, I pop his phone into my pocket and hope that he doesn’t notice it missing.
My heart pounds as he rubs his head and looks at me. He turns back and sets Damien’s rod up with a shiny lure. Without saying anything, he hurries through the door marked WC so I pull the phone out of my pocket and start scrolling. His contacts are filled with names of people I don’t know but then I see one called The Brambles. That had to be a nursing home if ever there was one. There’s no Instagram app on his phone. I pop the phone back on the shelf and push it out the way slightly to make it look like it had slid a bit.
I catch sight of an invoice for a fishing rod that is stuffed amongst other bits of paper and it’s in the name of Cody Teague.
The girls yell while Damien jokes around with them. I should join in, be more fun, make some family memories but I can’t, not right now.
Cody comes out of the WC and he’s doing up his dungarees. He stares around his boat and grimaces as he spots his phone. ‘Have you touched this?’
I shake my head. ‘Of course not.’
He stares at me with a sour look on his face. He doesn’t want me on his boat any more than I want to be on it but we’re both stuck with each other for the next hour.
My stomach is all over the place and the boat starts to turn and sway. I hang over the side in the hope that I won’t vomit. All this stress is playing with my innards.
‘Mummy, are you boat sick?’ Rosie grabs my hand.
‘A little, sweetie. A little. Don’t worry about me. You go and have fun with your dad. I’m alright.’
‘Poor Mummy.’ She gives me a clumsy hug from behind in her life jacket.
I’m sick of this boat. I’m sick of not knowing who is behind the messages and I’m sick of having to lie to find out the truth. I glance back at Damien and watch him being carefree with the girls. What I need is his level of simplicity in life. I glance directly down into the sea and I wonder how deep it is. In my mind, there is no bottom and I hold a tear back. Jess is down there somewhere. I have this weird feeling, like she’s crying for me to find her. My tears drop into the sea and I stare at the same spot; scared that if I look up or across, I will be sick. I just want to get off this boat and call The Brambles.
Too many people don’t come back alive.Those words hit me. I wipe my face. All I want right now is to get off this boat.
TWENTY
KATE
My heart pounds as the boat chugs into the harbour.
‘Mummy, can we have ice cream?’ Rosie looks up at me with pleading eyes and Millie turns to join in.
‘It’s nowhere near lunchtime yet. Maybe a little later, sweetie.’ I glance across the water and I can see that the ice-cream shop is in darkness and the closed sign is showing. ‘It’s not open yet, see.’ I point at it.
‘Aww, I want it to be open. Daddy said we can have ice cream.’
‘We can later.’
Rosie drops her hands and scowls.
Cody doesn’t waste any time in hopping off the boat and tying it up. He gets back on and fixes the metal plank so that we can disembark and I can’t wait to set foot on land. So much so, my legs are like jelly as I hurry off first, clattering across before taking the tiny jump to the ground. I grab the girls in turn and help them remove their life jackets. Then Damien comes off last, carrying their fish in a small bag.
The whizzing of wheels comes to a halt on the pavement above. Cody hurries off, nudging them aside. ‘Hope you all have a lovely day.’ With that he’s climbed the few steps up and he stops to talk to the woman getting off a bike. She removes her helmet and a cascade of wispy brown locks fall over her shoulders. Her hair flows with the breeze and messily half sticks to her head. Her lithe figure looks like that of an athlete in cycling gear. I glance at Damien who I can see has clocked her. He looks away quickly and helps the girls to do their coats up properly.
From where we are, I can listen to what is being said.
‘Daisy, my love.’
‘Got you a greasy sandwich, Dad. Plenty of bacon, just the way you like it.’
‘Just in time. I’m bleddy starving.’ I listen as he unwraps the foil.
‘Anyway, best get off. I have to meet Rachel at the café before I check in on Grandad. Got to give that baby a cuddle. See you later.’
