Horrified, she just looked at him. And he had the nerve to shrug. “What? You think I’m in love with the polished version? Please,” he scoffed. “I loveyou, sweetheart. It means all of theyousyou carry inside, like it or not. The hunted, the broken, the scared. Want to know why?”
She only shook her head.
“Because they all made who you are today.” He walked closer, but didn’t touch her. “You wouldn’t be you without them.”
No.
NO.
He was supposed to understand. To side with her. Even to help her. Betrayal was an arrow to her already shattered heart, and the scream was the one from a wounded spirit.“I’m not them!”she gestured wildly to the figures surrounding her like the trees had. “I’m mein spiteof them.”
That’s when she saw it. The same gesture from the figures, like a twisted choreography. Her hands went to her head pressing. And so did the other women’s. They wore the same clenched jaw, the same trembling legs, the same shallow breathing.
“I’m scared,” one said.
They all said.
With her voice.
All of those faces, all of those eyes, spoke with one voice.
Her voice.
Moved with the same movement.
Hers.
They were all her.
They were still all her.
And her spirit emptied within the space of a breath.
She would never love them.
She would never be grateful for them.
But she couldn’t fight them, not any more than she could fight how tall she was, or how much she weighed. She could fake it with heels and different cuts of dresses, but what she was would never change. That was how she was. Who she was.
And so, what if she let go? Of fear, of shame.
What if...
Slowly, tentatively, she stretched a hand, looked with fascination as the younger version of herself did the same, mirroring her movement. When their palms connected, it was peace she felt.
Utter, blinding, quiet peace.
She closed her eyes and sighed.
We’ll always be with you, she heard them whisper. But this time it wasn’t ominous. It was a reminder, but not of how weak she’d been because she didn’t save her mother, because she didn’t fight her father. It was a reminder of how strong she’d been to not sink.
When she opened her eyes, she was alone in the same forest, but the trees were just that. Trees. No need for mirrors anymore. All those women were inside of her. It felt a little tight, a little uncomfortable. But peaceful.
“It will take a moment to get used to the weight of it. Of them,” Hunter said, hands casually buried in his pockets, then shrugged. “You’ll be fine, Daphne.”
She dropped down and sat on the hard ground. Exhausted. Lightheaded. A little empty and too crowded at the same time. But for the first time in... ever, there was a morsel of something new. Hope. She didn’t know how to accommodate it in her life, but it was good. Good indeed.
When Hunter sat at her side and pulled her into his lap, she burrowed there.
