“Yes. As soon as I could reasonably get away. My tutor had moved on elsewhere by then, but the damage was done. Whispers, rumours, servants talk, of course. I was happy to learn that a distant aunt wanted me to live with her.”
“Family at least,” said Evan hopefully.
“Yes,” agreed Gabriel. “And for a while it was better. I still got stared at, but as time passed, they became used to me, and my aunt made sure I received a decent education.”
“But? There’s always abut…” Royce’s eyes were cold.
“My aunt passed away. Going on six years ago. And I was out on my own, with not enough money to settle into my own establishment.” The muscles of his cheek twitched, and the others could see his teeth clench for a few moments.
“I did what I had to do to survive, and I’ll not apologise for it. I did not enjoy it, or seek it, but…it was either that or starvation.”
“For how long?” Evan kept his voice level.
“What’s the date today?”
“Dear God.” Jeremy slumped. “I am so glad they found you, Gabriel. You must have been through hell.”
“Now and again,” he agreed. “But I survived.”
Royce shifted, a noticeable movement of shoulders straightening, legs flexing. “What of the tutor? Did you ever see him again?”
Gabriel raised his chin. “Yes I did. Last year.”
“What happened?”
“I killed him.” He paused for a dramatic moment. “But not deliberately. I caught up with him outside an inn, just before he propositioned another young lad. I hit him. Hard. He was drunk, fell over and cracked his skull on a nearby railing.”
“Good.” Royce nodded. “No more than he deserved.”
“I tried to feel sorry for what I’d done.” Gabriel couldn’t meet their gazes. “I professed remorse to the authorities, of course. And the lad stood up for me, putting all the blame on him. I was not detained, and the ruling was brought in as accidental death.”
“Finally,” said Jeremy with relief. “Justice.”
“Yes, I suppose,” answered Gabriel. “But…”
“But what?” asked Evan.
Gabriel looked around, his eyes a brilliant blue in the candlelight. “You all know who and what you are. What it takes for you to feel happy, and…and loved. I don’t.” He took a moment to collect himself. “I don’t know what it’s like to love and be loved by the right person. I’ve taken a man’s life, but I’ve never had a woman. Touched a woman. But the touches I have had…I haven’t liked very much. So where does that leave me? Am I to face a life that never knows the kind of happiness being loved can bring? Because if so, then one of you ought to break a few more ribs and throw my neck in for good measure, since I cannot begin to guess whether that kind of life is worth living.”
ChapterEight
Nothing had ever looked more welcoming than the lights of Wolfbridge Manor.
It had just begun to snow as the coach rolled up the driveway to the front steps, and Giles was more than ready to jump out, breathe clean cold air and deliver his passenger into her new home.
The interior had become stuffy and noisome over the past few hours, and although he could not find himself angry with Lady Gwyneth, he knew she’d be a lot better after a thorough washing from head to toe. He pulled out the blankets first, dropping them beside the coach, happy to see the front door open and the gentlemen emerge to help.
“Everything all right, Giles?” Jeremy was at his side. “Um…something doesn’t smell too good.”
“That would be her Ladyship,” sighed Giles. “It’s a long story, but you’d better get Evan boiling more water.”
“He’s used to it,” quipped Jeremy, wrinkling his nose. “Should we…er…the stable, do you think?”
Giles saw the other two heading their way. “Evan,” he called. “We need hot water, soap, and towels. Lots of each.”
Evan’s eyes widened, but he nodded. “It’ll be ready.” He spun around and rushed back into the Manor.
“Trouble?” Royce reached them.
