Page 75 of Doubts and Desires


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Catherine, Louisa’s cousin, reclining on a nearby chaise-longue, stifled a yawn. “Thank you, dear Uncle, but no. I find myself quite lacking in energy today. In fact, I’m of a mind to take a quick nap before dinner.”

Louisa, contemplating the possibility of an outdoor walk, moved toward the window to see if the weather would allow for such a venture. But, noting the bleak skies and seeing several loose leaves skipping past the window, decided she wasn’t in the mood to battle the elements. A stroll about the room would have to do. Vaguely, she wondered what Maxwell might be doing at that moment.

“Then will you play, Grace?” Aldous asked. “I should like a chance for revenge. As I recall, the last time we played, you and Josiah took every trick.”

Startled by a strange and sudden sense of recognition, Louisa turned and regarded her father. His words had certainly come from his mouth, yet she had the oddest impression they didn’t belong to him, that they’d been spoken by someone else. The significance of it taunted the edge of her mind but remained frustratingly elusive. It felt like she’d made a discovery. Found the missing piece of a puzzle. The lost key to a locked door.

“All right, yes, I’ll play,” her mother replied, laughter in her voice. “But you’d better prepare to lose again.”

What puzzle? What door?

Desperate, Louisa clung onto the baffling reaction, terrified that the hidden meaning behind it would fade, that she’d lose the answer she sought. Why were her father’s words so relevant? What was she missing? She echoed his words in her head, searching for the answer.

‘…will you play, Grace?’

The revelation hit her like a gust of icy wind, the shock of it stealing her breath and all but halting her heart. At that same moment, as she struggled to grasp a plausibility that was surely beyond plausible, the figure of a man appeared in the parlor doorway. Had he not been so familiar to her, so beloved, she might have taken less notice of his presence. After all, he was not supposed to be there. He was supposed to be two hundred miles away, in Scotland.

Maxwell?

The secondary shock of seeing her husband dissolved the last remnants of Louisa’s shattered composure. The world around her faded into twilight and the floor rose up to meet her with alarming speed. As she tumbled into oblivion, she heard Maxwell call her name.

*

“No!” Wincing, Louisaturned her head away, her eyes flickering open. Despite her obvious displeasure, her protestation at having a bottle of smelling-salts shoved under her nose came as a relief to Maxwell. Of all the reactions he might have expected upon his surprise arrival at Myddleton, seeing his wife drop to the floor in a dead faint was not one of them.

“Easy, my love.” He slid an arm beneath her shoulders and raised her up a little. “I have you.”

She blinked up at him, confusion, and perhaps a touch of fear, evident in her eyes as she grabbed at the lapel of his jacket. “Max?”

“Oh, thank goodness,” Grace said, fingering the pearls at her throat. “You gave us such a fright.”

Aldous spoke. “Move back, everyone, please. Let her have some air.”

“Do you hurt anywhere, love?” Maxwell asked. “Did you bump your head?”

“No, I…I don’t think so.” She touched his face, fingers icy against his cheek. “What are you doing here?”

“At this precise moment, feeling exceedingly guilty,” he replied, catching her cold hand in his. “I wanted to surprise you, not cause you to faint.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” she said. “I was… I mean, I’ve been feeling a little bit tired all day. I’m sure that was the main reason.”

“Would you like a drink, dearest?” Grace asked. “Some water, perhaps?”

“No, thank you, Mama.” Louisa rubbed her temple, her hand visibly trembling.

Maxwell raised her up a little. “Put your arms around my neck, love. Let’s get you onto the settee.”

“You don’t need to carry me, Max, I think I can stand,” she said. “Perhaps just help me to my feet.”

“All right. Careful, now. Lean on me.” He guided her to a nearby settee. “There. Better?”

“Yes, much.” She reclined against the cushions. “Thank you.”

“Are you sure?” Maxwell was not at all convinced. Her face was void of color and had a dazed expression, unfocused, as if her mind was elsewhere. He exchanged glances with Grace and Aldous. “I think we should call a doctor.”

“I agree,” Aldous said. “Can we send for him, Mama?”

“Of course.” The dowager nodded to a footman standing by the doorway. “See to it, will you?”