“You could always just tell Dad you want it. I know you long for his approval, but you’re twenty-nine, Cami. You’re a savvy businesswoman who can make her own decisions.”
“Annalise, I tell you, if you’d seen him…” Cami sipped her tea. “There’s more to the story. Astrid found the contract on my desk and put it in the system as a pending sale, which means inspections and surveys are automatically being scheduled.”
“Oh, Cami. You didn’t tell her?”
“Didn’t think I needed to tell her. Dad will be furious. He won’t be the contrite man saying, ‘Please.’ But I still have to tell Ben I can’t buy it. And that really pains me. I like him. I want his respect too. And I hate breaking contracts.”
“Dad won’t be furious, and if he is, so what? Maybe you’ll have the discussion you’ve needed to have for years.” Annalise reached across the table for Cami’s hand. “My dear sister, Ben will understand. As for Dad, he’ll get over himself. But you, stop blaming yourself for Mama’s death. You walk around like you have to be perfect and make up for something you didn’t do.”
“I do not think I have to be perfect.”
“Yes, you do. For Dad, now Ben. Cami, listen to me. I’ll say it again. God is the giver and taker of life. You have to trust Him that He loved Mama more than any of us, and if that summer day had not been her time, she’d still be here. Sweetie, she had a heart attack and was dead before she hit the ground.”
“I remember. She clutched her chest, cried out, and fell to the ground.”
“Then you know it’s not your fault.”
“You know what Dad said to me. ‘When it’s my time, I hope your sister is there. She’ll know what to do. She’ll not let me die.’”
“He didn’t mean it. He was angry. Hurt. Scared. Had lost the love of his life. Now he had to raise two daughters alone. He lashed out. It wasn’t right, but don’t let his words hang over you like a fog.”
“Me? He’s the one in the fog. I will always be the girl who let her mom die.”
“Then maybe it’s time for you to make a stand. Step away. Find what you’re looking for. Find peace and forgiveness. There is Someone who wants you to find Him. Someone waiting for you to call out to Him.”
Cami smiled and dabbed her eyes with the edge of her napkin. “Mama always brought everything back to her faith. When did you start?”
“I never stopped. I just didn’t push it on you. Cami, God doesn’t blame you. It was Mama’s time. She is happier, healthier, and better off in heaven. She’s singing praises, painting extraordinary pictures.”
“You’re right. And I guess she’d tell me to let go of the past. Including the inn. It would be a lot to oversee renovations from Indianapolis. I’d have to hire a manager to run things.” Deciding she was hungry, Cami grabbed some cheddar cheese and an apple out of the fridge. “I did see it, though, as a haven for people like Mama. Artists, or anyone really, who need an escape or a refuge.”
“But it’s in the system, right? Are you going ahead with it? Dad can just deal.”
“I’m not sure I’m brave enough to face him. I can deal with hard-nosed buyers without batting an eye, but Dad is a different beast.”
“Does Ben Carter have anything to do with your desire to buy the inn?”
Excitement shot through her at the mention of Ben’s name. “It’s not about Ben, but I really don’t want to let him down.” Cami cut up the cheese and apples, plated them with some crackers, and placed them in the center of the table. “Do you remember how much time we spent in the pool at the inn? We used to beg Dad to build us one in our backyard.”
Annalise reached for an apple slice. “He never did. Secretly, I think he liked going to spend time by the pool as much as we did. But he eventually stopped going.”
“See? Good memories. I just feel like if someone else buys the inn, they’re going to change it too much or knock it down. If it was any other property, that’s what I’d do. But if that happens, we’ll lose the last real memory of Mama as well as Ben’s grandparents.”
“We have all kinds of memories of Mama. Ben has the ones with his grandparents. But some of my favorite family memories are the church picnics or family game nights. How Mama really went all out for our birthdays and the holidays.”
Cami grabbed a slice of apple and topped it with a bite of cheese. “I gave up church, and Dad sold the house. Maybe I don’t want to give up all things related to Mama.”
“Then find your faith. Of all the things you’re doing, Mama would want you to have faith. Determine to trust God with your career, with Dad, even with Ben. It can’t be like that half-marathon we used to dream of running but never trained for. You have to make time to get to know the One you need to trust.”
She was right, which irritated Cami just a touch. Mama had brought them up in church, taught them to pray, to love God. But talking to Him after Mama died had seemed futile. He never answered her question, Why did You let it happen? If she couldn’t trust Him to keep Mama safe, how could she trust Him with anything else?
“Maybe I need to get back to God, but how does that help me now with the inn debacle?”
“Talk to God about it. See what He does.” Annalise reached for another slice of apple and cheddar cheese. “Tell Dad it’s too late; the sale of the inn is in the system.”
“It’s easy to be so bold when we’re at your kitchen table.”
She tried to picture walking into Dad’s office with a bold I’m buying the inn. She felt herself shrink back at the very idea.
