Ever since Ryder’s declaration of love, she’d wrestled with what to say when she saw him again. Wrestled with her own feelings. Did she love him? In that way?
Now that he was here, she might as well face it head-on. After all, as a future Wharton graduate, she should be bold, strong, and able to finesse uncomfortable situations.
“Hey,” she said, standing by his booth.
“Hey.” He slid out of the booth to greet her. He glanced out the large front window, then at her, dead on. Brown eyes to blue eyes. “Look, about what I said at the command post…”
“It’s okay.” She waved off his apology. “You were jacked up from the fire, and your emotions were running high. I know you didn’t mean it. So no harm, no foul.”
“I didn’t mean it?” The tone in his voice hardened. “I came here to apologize for telling you how you feel. For that, I am sorry. But don’t tell me how I feel, Elizabeth. What if I did mean it?”
A passing patron patted Ryder on the shoulder. “Good work saving those boys.”
“I didn’t really save them. I just found a way…” He exhaled. “Thank you, Mr. Patricoff.”
“I’m not trying to tell you how you feel,” Elizabeth said, stepping closer, lowering her voice to keep this conversation between them. People were probably already texting Granny or Will or Julie something like Elizabeth is talking to Ryder at Ella’s. “I only meant you’d just survived a big fire and?—”
“And I had smoke on the brain, sure, but I wasn’t that out of it. I knew what I was saying.” She stepped back as Ryder defended his position. “So I’m sorry I told you how you felt. About loving me. Also, I came to tell you the fire tower survived. I thought you’d want to know.”
“The tower survived? Didn’t that whole area burn?”
“Yep. Everywhere you look is burnt, except that old fire tower survived.”
“Oh my goodness, that’s…incredible.”
“Or a miracle.” She noticed his shoulders relaxing, but his voice remained stiff. “Sometimes things that should’ve died survive.” He returned to his seat. “Glad we cleared things up, Elizabeth.”
Wait a second. Nothing was cleared up. And he couldn’t end the conversation with “I knew what I was saying” hanging between them.
He loved her? For real?
“Here you go, our hero.” Tina set down a Hungry Man Meatloaf and large sweet tea as he tossed Elizabeth a final glance and reached for his ringing phone.
“Yes, sir…” he said, listening more than talking.
Elizabeth glanced toward the kitchen. She should relieve D’Angelo, but if she lost this moment to ask Ryder to expound on his comment, and thus settle her own confusion, she’d have to live with the swirl in her middle whenever he came around. Or bring up the subject again, and that was always awkward. Especially because she didn’t want to encourage him.
“When?” Ryder said. “Um, yeah, I guess so, but not just me, right? The others too.” He unwrapped his napkin roll and scooped a bite of buttery mashed potatoes. “Travis, we were just doing our job. It’s why we get the big bucks. What? Are you serious? No, I didn’t order that lumber.”
When he hung up, Elizabeth sat in the booth. “Another rough conversation with the boss?”
“The mayor wants to honor us, especially me for getting my guys out.”
“You don’t seem happy about it.” She pointed to the pile of peas on his plate. “You like peas? I hate peas. Mom used to serve them just to make me try food I didn’t like.”
“Peas are fine. Everything’s fine.” He sat back and looked her in the eye. “I’m not big on hero worship. Plus, Travis is still convinced I am buying expensive lumber for the fire tower but using it for my own house.” He took a long drink of tea. “Is there any way Dorsey can see when the order was placed and from where?”
“I’ll ask.” She sighed as some of her inner turmoil faded. “Look, sorry I tried to tell you how you felt.”
“It’s okay,” Ryder said. “I think we’re getting our signals crossed. Just friends, right?” He took up his fork, focusing on a thick cut of meatloaf stuffed with onions and topped with a tangy tomato sauce.
“Oh, okay, well, glad we had our little chat.”
On her way back to the kitchen, Elizabeth revisited the moment she saw him walking out of the woods, and nothing about it felt like “just friends.” When he looked down at her, she yearned. Yearned. Like some soppy heroine in a novel.
“Thanks, D’Angelo,” she said, taking over at the window, peeking out at Ryder. Nope, nothing about their relationship felt like “just friends.” It felt like love.
“Did you hear about the celebration?” Pops said when Elizabeth came home from the diner late Saturday night.
