“I’ve gotta go back to Texas.”
He takes a step back, his massive arm curling up as he smoothes his delicious beard with his very large, brawny hand. Yep, I’ll say it. Even at a time like this. Because now I’m mad for other reasons. He’s held me in those arms and I’ve felt that hand too. Mad because I like it here. I enjoy living with my dangerously good looking boss and his family. Sleeping in his sheets is like heaven, and I love his little girls too. The thought of letting him go, right now, makes me sick.
“My father passed and left me everything. I’m his only kid, and that man on the phone was the executor of his estate. Hewasa rich son of a bitch. Don’t know if he died with any of it, but whatever’s left is mine. The lawyer says he needs me there as soon as possible. I can’t drive—would you lend me one of your men?”
“No way in hell.” His eyes darken as he steps closer. “I’ll drive.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Like I’d evergiveher to one of my guys on a fifteen hundred fuckin’ mile road trip. That woman doesn’t leave my sight. She couldn’t run if something happened orsomeonehappened. She insisted on taking her own truck, which is fine with me. The girls don’t go back to school for a few more weeks and it’s so nice to have family around. Blythe and Justin offered to have them stay before I even asked.
It’s all taken care of between Toby and Brian here. They know when to switch groups and I know everything will be fine while I’m gone. I don’t know how long this trip will be but; it doesn’t matter. Justin took Addie and Evie with him this morning after coming to check on Blaze and it was a sad goodbye. Feels like they’re more attached to Dixie than they are to me.
She wanted to see Blaze before we headed out, but I’ve been waiting outside for a while. Just before I scratch my itch to find her, I see her coming out of the barn. Ifthere is anyone who can make a limp look like a swagger, it’s Dixie.
“Cool your jets, boss—I’m comin’.” She smiles and my smirk matches hers. I open the passenger side door and she climbs up. She’s got a small bag with her. I don’t know what’s inside though, since I thought I already loaded her bag in the back. I hope it’s snacks.
I shut her door and jog around the hood to get in the driver's side. Her truck isn’t as big as mine, but it feels nice driving something a little less heavy. “You comfy? Twenty hours is a long time, we’ll stop in Denver if we can make it that far, then drive the rest of the way tomorrow.”
“Sounds good. The drive up here was mild torture by myself.” She feigns exhaustion. “I’m happy to have company this time.”
I’m glad she feels that way, because I’m going to learn everything I can about her on this trip. If I plan to pursue another woman in this lifetime—I want to make sure she’sitfor me. I adjust the ball cap on my head and put the truck in drive. Off to the small town ofDill Creek, Texas we go.
“Dill Creek or bust?” I give her a half smile as I press the gas pedal.
“Dill Creek or bust.” She smiles back, and I have a feeling this road trip is going to be one hell of a ride.
We’re a few hours in and the conversation has been steady. We’ve talked about her previouscattle outfits and she’s told me some stories that have made me laugh harder than I have in a long time. She’s in the middle of one right now and I don’t know how it's going to end, but I’m hooked.
“He was young, eighteen or nineteen, only been cowboying for a month or two—a total rookie at best. I forget his name because I think he quit that day after his horse bucked him. But I was pullin’ cactus needles out of his ass for hours! I volunteered, because I knew if any of the others did it they’d give him hell. He needed a human after that, not a bunch of shit in his face.” She chews a bite of her apple then continues. “I sprayed him down with a hose and covered his butt in whiskey to make sure the wounds didn’t get infected. I rarely give out hugs, but for him I did. Never saw him again after that.”
God, love her. “Damn.” I chuckle and turn my chin toward her. “I bet he was grateful foryou.”
“Well, I was grateful for him too. It got me outta shoveling shit.” Seeing her laugh, genuinely laugh, it’s addicting. But then her eyes get big and she must realize something because she rummages through the small bag on her lap and pulls out a tiny tan colored case. My eyes shift back and forth from the road to her lap, then I catch her removing a sleeve of—pills? What the hell? From what I know of this woman, she doesn’t have a man in her life…except me. And she doesn’t sleep around with anyone either. Why is she worried about taking what looks like birth control? She sees the confused look on my face as she throws the tiny round pill into her mouth and takes a swig of her water to wash it down. “It’s just my insurance.” The air goes still between us and it hits me, along with a rage I haven’t felt for a very long time. I remember the day I caught Grady alone with her, and our conversation after I kicked his ass out.
“Sothisis how someone hurt you? Dixie, I’ve slaughtered men who put their hands on women they weren’t supposed to and I’d do it again. Swear to God. He knows the name of every sick fuck I’ve sent to hell. Does the devil need one more?”
Woah, that came out aggressive. I probably shouldn’t have gone off like that. But the call for justice burns in my veins. By the way she’s looking out the window, my guess is, when justice called the first time, no one picked up the fuckin’ phone. Her jaw is hard and so are her eyes when she turns back to look at me.
“I willneverbe as strong as a man, no matter what I do. If one wants to pin me to the ground, he can do it. I have my fists, my gun—and these pills if the first two don’t work. I didn’t have any of ‘em when it happened. I’ll be damned if I’m caught stupid a second time.”
I need to calm down. She’s telling me things without telling me things and now I want names. I want addresses; I want the badge number of the law enforcement officer who took the report. Though something tells me, there wasn’t one.
“We’ve got a lot of miles if you wanna talk. Like I told you before, whatever you say is safe with me.”
She doesn’t say a word. Just stares forward as we drive. A few moments pass and she reaches to turn up the volume on the radio, while I sit in my seat with the barely controlled rage inside of me, burning like a furnace.
Chapter Twenty-Five
I don’t know why I told him anything. It wasn’t my plan. I didn’t think he’d even pay attention to what I was doing with my purse. It was a pill, I could’ve had a headache for all he knew. But apparently he observes things. If I’m being honest though, it feels good to tell someone. If not everything, at least a little. I’ve carried it all silently for over a decade. The trauma, the pain, the grief. The sorrow of what could’ve been. It all hurt so much. It was the worst, most horrific experience that anyone could go through, and I thought at least one good thing was going to come from it—then it was gone.
I never want to feel that pain again. Not the attack—if that happened another time I’d survive. Might be a shell of a human, but I’d pull up my bootstraps and keep going. The miscarriage? No. That… I could not survive a second time. I knew it was a girl. Never went to a doctor though, and she was too small to see anything the night she was born—but I knew. I named her Sarah after my mama. I had an old boot box in my closet, so I cleaned her up, stole a hankie from my dad’s office, wrapped her in it and buried her next to her namesake. They’re both hidden away behind the hill that’s on the property I inherited.
When I turned up the volume on the radio, my boss said nothing. Just kept driving. It’s been all afternoon and we haven’t said two words to each other. I’m starving. We’ve only had the snacks and peanut butter sandwiches Addie made for us, before we left this morning. I’ve got to break the ice, but I don’t want to sound like a little kid begging for food.
“I think we need to stop for dinner and get a place to stay. We won’t make it as far as I planned, but that just means we’ll drive extra tomorrow. It’s only about twenty minutes to Cheyenne. People are still hanging around from the Fourth of July, it might be hard to get a room, but we’ll make it work.”
I’m glad it was him who started talking so I didn’t have to. “You have a place in mind?”
