“Did you want to have the memorial before or after I reach out to the glass company?” She sat back down and started looking up companies that made the glass figurines to get a timeline. “Do you know what type of sculpture she wanted?”
“Doesn’t matter. They do different designs. Just pick one.” He shrugged.
“Aaron.” Evie blew her bangs out of her face, frustrated with his lack of interest and the fact that he was leaving all the decisions to her when she barely knew Paula. She was also worried about how numb he seemed. “I know you’re angry about what she did, but you’ll regret not having more input later. Believe me.”
She checked her schedule and saw she had nothing on it that couldn’t be pushed to tomorrow. “Do you have plans for today?”
“Was gonna sit down with Tommy and accept my punishment.” He shrugged again, and Evie felt like shaking him but settled for rolling her eyes.
“He’s not going to punish you. Come on.” She stood up and collected her purse and jacket. “HELIX, let Tommy know I’m out taking care of things for Paula’s memorial.”
“Will do, Evie.”
“Where are we going?” Aaron stood up to follow her as she left the room.
“Giving you input.”
**********
Their first stop was the funeral home. Evie handed over the paperwork regarding the cremation, and the funeral director went over everything for the memorial service. When Aaron haltingly explained that Paula wanted her ashes placed in a glass sculpture, the director recommended a place in Tarrytown that did excellent work and had a quick turnaround time of four weeks.
They set a date for the memorial in mid-September, just to be sure the sculptures would be done, and were assured the funeral home would send the ashes to the glass-blowing studio. The two businesses had worked together many times and clearly knew each other well. Evie suspected they had a referral arrangement, but since it made things easier, she didn’t say anything. Aaron picked out an urn for Paula’s remaining ashes and turned down the funeral director’s gentle offer to view her body one last time, practically bolting from the building the moment they stepped outside.
After a quick stop for coffee, they drove to Tarrytown to pick out the sculptures and let the company know the ashes would be coming so they could prepare the necessary materials.
“We notified her adoptive parents and her birth mom.” Evie glanced at him. He had been quiet since they left the funeral home, and she knew the thought of seeing Paula’s body again had rattled him.
He looked down at his coffee cup. “I never met her adoptive parents. They refused to pay for university, and Paula had to strip to put herself through. She never forgave them. But her birth mother, Cecilia, she’s a... special lady.” His sardonic smile was back as he sipped his coffee.
“Your first day at Sloane was the day before Beau shipped out for his first tour in Iraq. He was supposed to be gone a year, but he got himself injured being the hero and had to come back.” Aaron shook his head, amused. “Almost lost his foot pulling a kitten from a building.”
“Anyway, I’ll tell you that story another time. I had it in our shared calendar weeks in advance that I’d be out with him that night. But Paula, being Paula and hating Beau, flew her mom to New York and planned all kinds of outings for that week, then got mad at me for refusing to change my plans. I slept at the Tower for the rest of that week because she and her mother were mad at me. How did she take it?”
“I wasn’t there. Tommy and Nissa flew up to do it personally and offered to bring her here for the memorial.” Evie kept her tone neutral, not wanting to repeat Cecilia’s comments. After hearing about the IUD, though, she had a better understanding of why Cecilia thought Aaron was involved in Paula’s death.
“Why did Paula hate Beau so much?” She changed the subject, not wanting him to question her further.
“Ah.” He leaned back with a small smile. “She hated sharing me. When I said I gave up a lot for her, I meant I gave up almost everything and everyone. She hated me having anyone but her, and I refused to cut Beau out. She wasn’t jealous; I was her everything, and she needed to be my everything.”
“You know that’s not healthy, right?” Evie glanced at him, wondering if Nissa had been right about Paula.
“Yeah. I know. It worked for us because I loved her so much that I was willing to do whatever I could to keep her with me. Would I get into another relationship like that?” He shook his head. “Fuck no.”
“Loved?”
“I just feel anger and resentment toward her.” He looked out the window. “I think I fell out of love with her the minute I heard her say, ‘They refuse to tie my tubes without Aaron’s signature, so I had them put in a copper IUD.’ It was like my world dropped away, and I walked out of the house and went to Beau’s place. I was going to divorce her.”
“She probably realized not being able to share you meant not being able to share you with your children, too,” Evie said after a few minutes of thought. “She didn’t tell you because she knew you’d leave.”
“Do you want kids?” He looked over at her.
Evie blinked, surprised by the sudden question. “Um.” She lifted a shoulder in a half-shrug. “Yes? I think?” Seeing his confusion, she tried to explain. “I’ve always been of the mindset that if it happens, it happens. Right now, I’d rather it didn’t, but I think my future has kids in it, at least two. I don’t know if I’d want more than that.”
“Why not right now?” He shifted to face her in the passenger seat, sipping his coffee. She could tell he was tired of talking about Paula.
“I’m not sure I’m with the right person to think about having children with,” she admitted. In truth, she knew she wasn’t. Having children with Alex would be an awful experience.
“Trouble in paradise?” Aaron smirked.
