“We were in California.”
“We?”
“Yeah,” I replied. “Me and you. It was weird. The sun was setting the entire time we drove there, and then when we got there, we settled into the sand and just watched the frozen sunset.”
“Hm,” Denise huffed. “That actually sounds pretty nice.”
My eyes widened. “Yeah?”
Her cheeks darkened a little. “Yeah. You don’t think watching a sunset on a California beach sounds nice?”
“No, I do,” I responded. “I’ll take you sometime, then.”
She scoffed. “Sure.”
“I’m serious.” I stood up from where I was lying. “I know things don’t seem promising now, but we’re gonna take your mom out, and then when you’re back in my dad’s good graces, I’ll take you to California, and we’ll watch the sunset.”
There was a small smile on her face that faded. “You know, when you say it like that, with so much of it hinging on your dad and my mom, it makes it sound less nice.”
I opened my mouth to respond, then stopped. There was no real way to respond to that. She probably felt hopeless, and promising her things with such massive obstacles in the middle probably wasn’t helping. She pulled her knees up and buried her head in them, and my heart broke. I wished I knew everything that was going through her brain, and I wished even more that I knew how to help. There was a small piece of me that wanted to load her into my car and drive until we hit the beach, but if there was anything I learned as the son of a mobster, it was that running never solved anything.
“You know what else?” I said. “In my dream, your hair was brown again.”
Her face lifted, and she set her chin on her knees. “Really?”
“Yeah, and you didn’t have contacts either. You were just your natural, gorgeous self.”
“Flattery will get you nowhere, Carducci,” she growled, though it was said with a small smile on her face.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I seem to be doing okay. You haven’t kicked the ever loving shit out of me in over five minutes.”
She chuckled. “You wouldn’t wake up. I tried shaking you first.”
“Sure,” I said, dragging the word out and rolling my eyes. “Okay. Let me change and reach out to the guy who I had set up the safe house, and then we’ll go.”
She nodded. “Okay.” I turned and started to walk out of the room when Denise beckoned me back. “Hey, Ash?”
I looked over my shoulder. “Yeah?”
“Thanks. For saving my life. I know that I don’t matter much, but I’ll do the best I can to not waste it.”
There was no hesitation in my movements as I turned around and crouched in front of the bed so that I could look into Denise’s eyes. She was wearing contacts to give them a slightly darker shade of blue, but even that aside, they were still her eyes, and I adored them.
“You matter, Denise,” I said. “I wouldn’t have put myself between you and Anthony fucking Carducci if you didn’t.”
She rolled her eyes. “Maybe you’re just delusional.”
“No. I mean, yes, you matter tome, but you also just…matter.” I tapped her foot gently with my hand. “You matter. You have a fucking masters degree. Your life means something in this world. Never forget that.”
Denise’s lip wavered a little bit, and water immediately rose to her eyes. “I don’t know how true that is, but thank you.”
I couldn’t blame her for lacking confidence after floating around for three decades with not many people giving a shit about her. If I did nothing else, even if Denise and I never moved forward, I wanted to restore her confidence and have her believe for herself that she meant something.
“Okay. I’m gonna go get changed, then we’ll leave.”
She nodded. “Yeah, okay. Thank you.”
I left the room and walked down to the wing where my bedroom was, passing Arturo on the way, who was sitting on a bench between his bedroom and mine, tapping away at something on his computer.
