“You pushed her on purpose?” he asked, a horrified look in his eyes.
“No!” I yelped. “Y-your father sent Romeo away to California for a few days. Lucia was alone, and I figured if I could coax her out of her room I could trip her in the garden or something. I was thinking a twisted ankle at worst. She just wouldn’tgo. Everything I said to her, she questioned it. Every time she looked at me with the damned confused expression, I saw my life with you drifting away and I just couldn’t take it. I got frustrated and was just trying to get her to go down the stairs. I didn’t mean for her to fall, but she did.” I clasped my hands over my ears as if they could block out the echoes of Lucia thumping and thudding her way down the stairs. The crack of her head on the wall. The groans of pain at the bottom. “I didn’t mean to.”
“Philippa,” Gianni’s voice broke across to me. “Look at me.”
I shook my head, feeling the tears stride down my face. “I don’t want to lose you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
Gianni grabbed my hands and pulled them down into my lap and my nose burned. He looked up at me, and I was at least marginally relieved that his expression wasn’t harsh, but the pity I read in his eyes didn’t feel much better. “Did youwantto hurt Lucia?”
“Not like that,” I whimpered.
“But you wanted to hurt her?” Gianni asked.
It felt like I was walking into my own demise. Gianni’s tone was drenched in disappointment, and I was afraid of what he was going to think if he knew the truth. Still, I didn’t want to lie to him. He’d know I was, even if I tried. “Yes.”
“Why?” he asked. “Lucia is a good person.”
“Because you love her,” I said. “I know that no matter how hard I try a part of your heart will always belong to her and I just thought…” I lowered my head. “I don’t know what I thought.”
Gianni stood up and reached a hand out for mine. I looked up at him and put my hand in his and he pulled me up to stand. He dragged me forward until I was pressed against his body, then he wrapped one arm behind my back, while the other came to rest gently on the side of my face. He looked down at me as if I was the only thing in the world, and it sent my heart into overdrive. It was as hard to stay looking into Gianni’s eyes as it was to look away. It was as if he had me captured there, and even though I felt as if I would melt if I continued to stare into his eyes, I couldn’t stop.
“Can I tell you a story?” he asked.
“Okay.”
“I first met Lucia when I was still a little boy. My father had already decided I was worthless to him by then, so I wasn’t even allowed to talk to her. It wasn’t that I thought she was cute or particularly attractive or anything, but I saw how sad and lonely she looked. Though the Bonifacio parents did seem to care for their children more than my dad cares about us, they saw Lucia as a bargaining chip with my dad, and they were a little too eager to marry her off to whichever one of the sons Angelo selected. For some reason, I wasn’t that son.”
“That made you sad?” I asked, my heart hurting.
“It did. I didn’t understand why I wasn’t good enough for my dad. When Romeo was born, he started to get all of these things and I didn’t understand why he was getting them and I wasn’t. Lucia was one of those things. Over time, I started to wish for the things that Romeo had that I didn’t, Lucia included. I didn’t know her. We’d said a few words to one another here and there, but as far as things were concerned, we were total strangers.”
Gianni had said something similar to me before, but it didn’t change the way he talked about her. “Yeah…”
“I used to think about her all the time, but I used to think about everything Romeo had all the time. I made it my mission to prove to my dad that I was worthy of the things that Romeo had, and I wanted to take them from him. Due in part to the fact that Lucia did grow up to be very beautiful, it made it very easy for me to begin describing my feelings as love.”
At this point, Gianni leaned down and kissed me. It seemed like an odd place to do it, but it helped to quell my sick stomach a little bit.
Gianni continued. “Then you came along and I didn’t think about her so much.” He smiled at me. “The only woman I cared about seeing was you. The only one I cared about talking to was you. I didn’t realize thatthis,” he put one hand to my chest and one hand to his, “is what love really is. The way we can talk for hours and never get bored. The way your letters would take me away from the world inside that house. The way,” his gaze got a little darker, “our bodies fit together like pieces made for each other.” He moved his hands to the sides of my neck and tears started to fall down my face. “I care for Lucia like I care for my siblings or for the Bonifacios or…” He chuckled and I noticed tears gathering in his eyes as well, “… pizza? I don’t know. I can’t say that she means nothing to me, but when it comes to you. There’s no comparison,Bellissima. You have my whole heart, and I can tell you honestly and truly, that not only are you mycurrentlove, but you’re also the only one I’ve ever had, and the only one I ever want.”
I hiccuped as emotions came flooding out of me. “Really?”
“Really,” Gianni said. “I love you so much more than anything I’ve ever known.”
“I love you too.”
“Wait here,” Gianni said. He gave me a kiss, then he backed away from me and walked into the kitchen. I heard a cupboard open and closed, then he walked back into the living room and back up to me. “Promise me, you’ll never hurt someone like that again.”
I shook my head. “I won’t. I promise.”
“Then…” He dropped to one knee in front of me and chills ran their way up my arms and down my spine. He pulled his hands from behind his back and he had a small, black, velvet box in his hands. He tipped the top back and revealed a beautiful ring. It had a diamond band, interlaced with pink diamonds every few rocks, and the main stone was a flower marquise-cut pink diamond. “Philippa Varberio, will you marry me?”
My whole body was shaking and my throat was nearly closed off from the lump of emotions lodged there. “Yes.”
Gianni pulled the ring out and slipped it onto my finger, then I slipped my hands onto his face and kissed him. He stood up, taking me with him, and scooped me up into a bridal hold. He carried me up the stairs and gently guided me down onto the bed. He laid atop me and lifted my, now adorned ring finger to his lips and kissed it. He kissed his way down my arm and across my chest, eventually up to my lips. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop tears from spilling from my eyes. It was dangerous how much I loved Gianni, and as his hands slid down the bend of my body, my breathing labored. I could lose myself in him forever.
Thanks to this ring, I could.
We rolled until I was straddling over him, and he ran his hands up under my shirt. I took over for him, grabbing the base of my shirt and as I pulled it over, the diamond caught the light and stopped me in place. I stared at it until Gianni sat up and wrapped his arms around me.
