“Not yet,” the earl answered. “I believe Miss Bartholomew should have some say in this.”
*
They drove throughthe streets for a time, but Cormac didn’t push her to make a decision. Clearly, she’d been through hell this evening. Just as he had. Even now, he was barely hanging on to his own strength. He’d eaten so little, the slightest movement made him dizzy.
“I’m sorry I was late,” he said. Inwardly, he thanked God that his secretary had read his mail and learned what was happening with the auction. He couldn’t imagine what might have happened otherwise.
Cormac reached out to take her hand, meaning to reassure Miss Bartholomew. But then he realized she wasn’t wearing gloves. Her hands were cold, and he felt the slight abrasions on her wrists where her hands had been bound. He raised her wrist to his mouth, as if he could soothe the hurt away. She gave a soft cry but didn’t pull her hand away.
“Emma,” he breathed. He needed to speak her name, to reassure her that everything was all right now.
“Don’t,” she whispered. It was then that he realized she was holding onto her emotions by a thread.
“Are you hurt?”
“No.” She closed her eyes and leaned against the side of the carriage. “Just take me back.”
He heard the disappointment in her voice and knew better than to ask her about marriage. He blamed himself for not being there. He’d let her down tonight, both at the ball and at the auction.
“Why did your family do this to you?” he asked. “It wasn’t necessary.”
“Our family is in debt,” she answered. “Lucy told me my father could be sent to debtor’s prison—and he would die if that happened. This was her way of trying to pay off what we owe.”
He’d never imagined her stepmother would do such a thing—or that Emma would agree to it. “I already offered to wed you before,” he said quietly.
“Even with the money you bid, I don’t know if it will be enough to save him.” Her voice was weary, filled with hopelessness. “And I have no dowry.”
“The money be damned,” he said. “You’re worth a hundred times that.” He meant it, for she had a courage he’d never imagined. Cormac took her hands in his and insisted, “I will help you. And your family.”
She withdrew her hands from his. “Lord Dunmeath, find another heiress to wed. Someone beautiful with a dowry who can be the sort of wife you need.”
But there was no time for that. His days were numbered, and he needed to marry immediately.
“And what if the woman I want to marry is you?” he asked. “Would you not consider it? I could save your father and take care of you.”
“I can’t,” she whispered. “Don’t ask that of me.”
“Why can’t you?” he demanded. “Aye, I’ve made mistakes. But I deserve to know why you won’t be giving me a second chance.”
“Because I can’t rely on you,” she blurted out. “I don’t trust you.”
Her words were an invisible blow he hadn’t expected, and he fell silent.
“You said you would be at the ball tonight. And you weren’t.” In her voice, he heard the quiet censure. “Then you weren’t there at the auction. Your secretary had to place a bid on me so I wouldn’t be auctioned off to someone else.”
“I had my reasons,” he said. Namely that he’d been so sick he could barely get out of bed. But he didn’t want to admit his weakness to her. Was it better for her to believe him to be absentminded or dying? He didn’t know.
“You’re not a man I can depend on,” she said softly. “I can’t marry you.”
Her words bothered him more than he’d imagined they could. He liked Emma, and he’d thought he could give her a happy life with whatever time he had left. He’d never considered that she would truly not want him.
Aye, he understood why she felt the way she did. Hehadlet her down. More than once. But that was beyond his control. He was dying, and every day was a gift to him. Was it so terrible that he wanted to spend his last weeks with someone he considered a friend? But it sounded as if she didn’t even consider him that.
“What if... we come to an understanding?” he offered. “You want to save your family from debt. I want the chance to change your mind. Allow me to court you and show you that I can be a different man.”
The carriage pulled to a stop in front of the school, and she started to move toward the door.
“Flowers and empty promises won’t make me change my mind,” she said. “I’m sorry, Lord Dunmeath. But I cannot marry you.”
