He gave a single nod. Though he was armed only with a sword, she felt entirely safe with him.
‘Did you sleep at all last night?’ she asked. He shook his head, but she saw the faint upward turn of his mouth.
‘Neither did I.’ She stood up from the large stone and removed her shoes. Then she tucked up her skirts and stepped into the cool water. ‘I suppose you think I am mad to go riding at a time like this, only to sit and sew.’
‘It’s what you’ve always done when you are troubled,’ he said quietly.
‘I fear for what lies ahead,’ she said. ‘I don’t want Alan to die. And I’m afraid of what Owen will do when he does.’ She walked along the water’s edge, wishing she could tell him everything. But he would not understand the guilt she held in her heart. Every time she had made her own choices, defying the commands of others, it had resulted in tragedy.
‘I will not let anyone harm you,’ he stated. And she knew he meant it. This fierce warrior would guard her from any foe, no matter how many enemies might threaten her.
‘You cannot guard me from myself.’ She would not look at him now. ‘If I were a different woman, perhaps I could put aside my feelings, obey my husband’s wishes and conceive a child to save Pevensham. But I can’t. I won’t.’
‘Are you afraid of me?’ he asked quietly.
‘I am afraid of the way I feel when you kiss me.’ But more than that, she was afraid to become pregnant again. Deep inside, she believed that any child she conceived would not live. Many women miscarried, time after time. And what reason was there to betray her honour for the sake of a child who might die? ‘You made me remember.’
And God help her, it had hurt her deeply. Warrick had always known how to touch her, how to tempt her. No longer did she trust herself. This time, she did turn to face him. She stared into his deep blue eyes. ‘I need you to leave Pevensham. Go back to your family, go back to your home. I beg this of you.’
‘Why?’ He spoke the words with a gruffness that revealed his own frustration.
‘Because my husband deserves a better death than this. How can I betray him and then watch him die? It’s not right.’
‘No, it isn’t. But he wants to know that you will be protected after he is gone. Were I in his place, I would want the same.’
‘Alan is a good man,’ she admitted, her eyes filling up with tears. ‘He deserved a wife so much better than me. I wish, sometimes, that I could have been the woman he wanted.’
‘You are that woman.’
He didn’t seem to understand what she meant. Rosamund stepped out of the shallow water. Her bare feet were cool against the flat stone, but she faced him. ‘I cannot simply stand back and let others command my life. With or without Alan.’ Pevensham would fall into Owen’s hands by right of succession, but she would still have her dower portion, according to the law. The only question was whether Owen would leave her alone.
She could ask to live in Ireland, but it would mean leaving behind the people of Pevensham.
‘What do you want to do?’ Warrick asked.
She sat down upon the rock, folded up her sewing, and put it away. ‘I will need someone to protect me from Owen after Alan is gone.’
He adjusted his sword belt and sat down beside her. There was tension in his shoulders as he stared at the water. ‘And you want me to be your hired sword.’
‘I would pay you,’ she started to say, but he stared hard at her.
‘I don’t want your silver, Rosamund. And I won’t be under your command, to go or stay as it pleases you.’
The stone beneath her palms felt cold and damp from the water, but the chill inside her went deeper. ‘What is it you want?’
‘I want you as my wife, just as you were before.’ He reached out to trace the curve of her cheek. ‘I want your bare skin beneath me when I bury myself inside you. I want to touch you until you cry out with mindless need. The way it was, years ago.’
Her body seemed to come alive at his words. She bit her lip, trying to push away the unwanted feelings.
‘I won’t stand by and let another man take you from me again, Rosamund. When Alan dies, I intend to claim you.’
He spoke like a barbaric conqueror, bent upon taking her captive. And despite her attempt to remain calm, her heart beat faster.
‘And what if I refuse?’ she whispered.
‘You won’t want to.’ His hand moved lower, down her throat. She was intensely aware of his masculine scent, and he slid his fingers beneath the chain of her necklace. It hung above her bodice, and he leaned in to steal a kiss.
She tried not to move, tried not to respond to him. But his hand moved lower still, to the soft curve of her breast. He kissed her deeply, his tongue sliding within her mouth as his thumbs found her erect nipples.
