“It’s been a month, Z. I’m not asking you to tell me the meaning of life, just if you’re happier now than you were before.”
Tears sting my eyes. I’m not equipped to handle this conversation right now. “That’s a tough question when I’m not…”
“Not what?”
Not over you, I think. “It’s complicated, C.”
“Sounds like you need help figuring things out.”
I chew on my bottom lip. There’s no doubt that if I open up to Connor, he’ll say things that will make me want him more. But what feels good in the moment isn’t always what’s good in the long run.
“Do we really have to talk right now?” I whisper. “Isn’t there anything you’d rather do?” As I kiss him, I press my chest against his.
He cups the back of my head and kisses me so deeply it makes my head buzz more than the gin. I moan against his mouth. I love the way we kiss.Love it.
After a few minutes of kissing and touching, I can feel that he’s hard again. Good because I want to be with him again, too.
“Do you have almond oil in your overnight bag?” he asks.
“I have coconut oil for my skin.”
I know what he wants. When I lived at C’s place, I had three supplies of natural oils. Some for moisturizing my skin after an exfoliating scrub, some for cooking with, and some for us to use during sex.
“Get it for me.”
“C, here and now?” I whisper hesitantly.
Booty sex is not a special occasion thing with him. He’s an ass man in every sense of the word.
“In the shower,” he says, his fingers pinching my nipple slowly.
The sensation sends shivers through my body, like everything he does. I lick my lips, but he pulls his hand away and sets it on his chest, waiting for me to obey.
“Go on, Z.” It’s a command, and my body finds that impossible to resist.
I scramble from the bed and dig through my bag.
C rises and heads into the bathroom. By the time I join him, he’s already in the shower with warm water raining down on him. He looks so good. Male dancers have beautiful bodies, but C’s thick, bulging muscles are what really does it for me.
“C,” I say, stepping gingerly into the shower and handing him the small bottle.
“Yeah?” he asks, taking it from me.
“I haven’t done this since us…” I bite my lip to emphasize my point. “Be gentle, okay?”
“No toys?”
I shake my head.
“Why not?”
I shrug.
“Answer, Z.”
Heat rushes to my face. “I like it with you. Otherwise…not sure. Alone in bed? No.”
“Turn around.”
