Our eyes met. We froze.
“Sooo,” I said in a weak, sing-song voice. “How’s your morning going?”
Ben lost it. He rolled over onto his back, arms splayed by his sides, and laughed until tears streamed from his eyes. Sam took the opportunity to flail all over him. Ben had to bear hug the dog to get him to stop. Sam settled in Ben’s grasp, tongue lolling out of his mouth like this had been his goal all along.
I would have laughed along with him, but I was afraid to. My ribs screamed in pain.
“God, I needed that,” he said when he calmed down. He let Sam go and turned to look at me. “You okay?”
“It’s a good thing my boobs aren’t fake, or you would’ve just popped one. You?”
He winced. “I think my left testicle has ascended back into my body cavity.”
I snorted out a laugh before I could catch it, then clutched at my side. “Ow,shit.”
He immediately sobered, clambering up onto his knees to shuffle over to me. “What’s hurt?”
“My ribs.”
He swore. “I landed on you, didn’t I?”
“You did. But it’s okay, they’re just bruised. Want to help me up and then call it a day?”
He nodded. “Oh, yeah. I’m done.”
Twenty minutes later, we were sitting on the couch drinking hot chocolate. I had a bag of frozen peas pressed to my ribs – Ben insisted. He sat beside me, manspreading in a way that told me it was less about taking up space and more about giving his crotchal region room to recover.
“What about snowshoeing?” he asked.
“Yeah, we could definitely manage that.”
“But not today.”
“Definitely not today. What do you want to do instead?” I wiped my face clean of all expression and turned toward him. “We could listen to some music.”
I must not have done a good enough job, because he frowned. “Uh…sure.”
I raised the stereo remote and hit play. Elton John’s voice rang out through the speakers. Ben sent me an unimpressed look. I opened my mouth.
“Don’t you dare,” he warned.
“B-B-B-Benny and the jets,” I sang at him.
He groaned. “You are the absolute worst.”
My answering smile felt feral. I hadso muchplanned. “This is nothing, my friend. Nothing, I tell you.”
“You know, you’re kind of scary when your face gets like this.”
I cut the music off. “I think I learned it from Willow.”
“That’s a frightening thought.”
“Hopefully she’ll be a kind and benevolent overlord.”
He leaned closer and dropped his voice. “When she grows up and takes over the world, you mean?”
I nodded and sat back, away from him. His proximity and my hormones weren’t a good combination. “Okay, but seriously though. Do you want to stay and watch a movie or something? I won’t be offended if you say no.”
