Bobby actually took his earbuds out at that point.
“No,” I said, “don’t fight him.He’s not worth it.Okay, fine, beat him up, but only a little.”
“Babe,” Bobby said.He came across the room and braced me by the arms.“This TV show is a big deal.”
“It’s not a big deal—”
Bobby gave me direct eye contact.
“Okay,” I mumbled, “but it’s not worth it.You are way more important to me, Bobby, and I don’t want you to feel like I’m leaving you behind or escaping in a life raft or abandoning ship, uh, while the musicians play.I guess.”
A pause as Bobby recalibrated.“When did you watchTitanic?”
“Last weekend.Keme had never seen it, and hecried.He says he didn’t, but I know he did.”
“This is a big deal,” Bobby said.“I love you.I want you to have this; you deserve it, and you’re going to do great.”I opened my mouth, but he said over me, “I trust you, Dash.I want this for you.”
“I want this forus,” I said.
Bobby gave me that goofy grin.And then he turned me toward the front door and gave me a pat on the bum to get me moving.
(It was weirdly incentivizing.)
When I opened the front door, Julian gave me a huge smile and started inside without waiting for an invitation.The movement turned into an attempted hug, which I forestalled coolly and gracefully: by planting a hand on his chest, squirming backward, and tripping over an umbrella stand.
“Are you okay?”Julian asked.“Here, let me—”
“I’m fine!”I scooted back, got the umbrella stand between us, and managed to regain my footing.A part of me decided at that exact moment that it would be ideal to keep a sword-cane in the umbrella stand for exactly this kind of situation.(This kind of situation being amorous gentlemen callers who can’t read the room.They were an epidemic during the era of sword-canes.It was why ladies kept leaving town and going to the beach.)
“Uh, right,” Julian said.He raised his hand again like he might try for a shoulder squeeze or, God forbid, another hug, but then he let it drop.“Okay, yesterday wasinsane.I’ve been piecing together footage all weekend, but yesterday—”
“Yesterday was insane in a bad way,” I said.“Just to be clear.”
“Yesterday was insane in agoodway, Dash.Do you have any idea what you did?You made sure this show is going to happen.I mean, my God, doing the big reveal like that in front of all those people?And then he attacked you?That’s gold.And you were so brave.I’ve been calling to check on you, but—”
“Julian.”
“—you didn’t answer any of my messages—”
“Julian.”
“—talked to my boss, and she thinks we should shop it to Netflix—”
“Julian!”
He stopped.“What?”
“I’m not going to sleep with you.”
The distant sounds of Indira working in the kitchen reached us.
“Uh,” I said, “to clarify: I appreciate this opportunity.I’m excited about the idea.I want to do it.But I love Bobby, and I’m not going to have sex with you to—to seal the deal, as it were.”
Julian didn’t say anything for several seconds.And then he said, “What?”
“No sex.I’m not going to trade my body—” I could feel the conversation getting away from me, but I also wasn’t sure how to stop it.“—for this opportunity.No judgment on people who do.And I’m not trying to make a broader statement about sex work, whether people find themselves doing it by choice or because they think they have no other option—”
“Stop, stop, stop.Dash, stop.”
