“It’s your leg!”Fox shouted back.“But a less attractive word for it!”
“Well, look at that,” Indira said.“Dash, we’re all happy you’re awake.I’ve got breakfast ready.”
“It’s WAFFLES,” Millie announced.
“You can’t have any,” Keme told me.
“And PANCAKES!”
“You can’t have any pancakes either.”
“AND APPLE CINNAMON CRUMB MUFFINS!”
Okay, here’s the thing: waffles and pancakes are literally the food of the gods, but Indira’s apple cinnamon crumb muffins made me levitate out of my bed.
In a tee and shorts, I opened the door.
And Milliescreamed.
This was immediately followed up by a collision—Millie crashed into me and grabbed me in a bone-rattling hug.
“YOU PROPOSED TO BOBBY!!!!”
I’m not even kidding: I couldn’t hear anything for about thirty seconds after that.
Eventually, though, Millie released me.Indira kissed my cheek and told me she was happy for us.(At least, I think that’s what she said—my ears were still ringing.) Fox tried to get me to smoke a candy cigar with them (they were dressed like a nineteenth-century banker who got caught up in the shootout at the O.K.Corral—a heavy wool suit, sleeve garters, and cap guns strapped to their hips).(Also, I thought the manlysmoke-a-cigarthing was about having a baby, but honestly, everything straight men did was a mystery to me.) Keme hugged me—not exactly bone-rattling like Millie’s, but in its own way, weirdly as intense.
He whispered, “I told him if he hurts you, I’m going to kill him.”
Okay, that was it.I was done.Imelted.
And then Keme added, “And if you hurthim, I’ll killyou.”
At which point, he tried to knee me in the, um, nuggets.
All in all, a mixed message.
When I finally freed myself, I somehow got out the question: “How did you know?”
“Bobby gave us money to get a hotel room,” Millie said.“So you could have the house to yourselves last night.”
And then shegiggled.
I was an adult.I was mature.I was independent.I was a successful author.
But ladies and gentlemen, I blushed.Again.
“And this morning,” Keme said, “he told us how you screwed everything up.”
“What?”
“He didn’t say that,” Indira said with a chiding glance at Keme.“Bobby told us that you had proposed to him.Now come on; we want to hear everything over breakfast.”
So, I told them.I skipped over some of the heavier details and focused, instead, on the happy stuff, making particularly sure to emphasize how brave I’d been, and how I’d taken the initiative, and how I hadn’t let my fear of navigating relationships hold me back from making the best and most important decision of my life.
(And yes, there were waffles and pancakesandapple cinnamon crumb muffins.And, almost as importantly, there was bacon.)
And when I finished, Fox said, “You didn’t have a ring?”
