It’s not like Len and I speak regularly or anything, but he’sgot this habit of calling me by my full name. It’s so patronizing. He can’t even address someone without being annoying. Definitely his seven.
“I don’t really have an opinion,” I say. “Because I don’t really care.”
Charlie and Len look at me, impressed.
“Helloooo?” Olivia is waving a hand over her head, trying to get our attention about something. She’s talking to Lauren, who is on the student activities committee with us—or SAC, as we call it. We had AP English together last year, and she lives a few doors down from Rob and me. I volunteered us to take her to school last year, but Charlie said it was out of our way. Which is ridiculous, of course, but not very surprising.
“You can see mybra,” Olivia squeals, holding out her bottle of sparkling water to us as evidence. It’s currently spraying all over her tank top, and Lauren steps to the side, presumably in search of drier ground.
“Not a bad way to kick things off,” Len says.
“You’re nauseating.” Charlie grabs my elbow and drags me over to Olivia. “He makes me feel dirty,” Charlie says. Olivia raises her eyebrows, and Charlie clarifies, “Not in a good way. Like I just showered in fish oil.”
“You’re going to make me lose my bagel,” I announce, even though I still haven’t consumed a thing.
“Watch that,” Charlie says, reaching over to cap Olivia’s water. “So what’s the deal with you two, anyway?”
“Who?” Olivia fans out her tank top.
“My brother?”
Olivia stops, drops her shirt, and takes a huge gulp of sparkling water. “Three months,” she squeaks out while swallowing. It surprises me. I figured they were getting close this summer, but this means they were together at the end of school. Before Rob even left.
“Three months?” Charlie’s face is turning red. You can tell because she gets these little splotchy marks where she isn’t wearing a lot of foundation.
“Yeah, but it was the summer,” Olivia bleats. “You know, we weren’t really around.”
“What are you talking about, ‘we weren’t around’? We were at the beach together, like, daily,” Charlie says.
Olivia scrunches up her lip. “I like him,” she says.
“At least we know they’re not sleeping together,” I offer.
Olivia swats me on the shoulder, but it’s playful, and even Charlie has to smile. Olivia is saving herself for marriage or until she can legally drink or something. Her mom got kind of religious after she married Olivia’s stepdad. They all go to church on Sundays. We’ve never talked about why, exactly, she’s waiting, but my guess is she has a better handle on all of itthan I do. The moral part, anyway. So far as I know, she’s only just made out. I would bet money that’s all she has done with Ben, too.
Olivia starts adjusting her tank top in the glass window. I slump into a seat and open my sparkling water. I haven’t even touched my bagel yet. Every time I try, my stomach launches a counterattack. Turns out, I’m completely terrified about seeing Rob. It’s totally messing with my morning. My hands are tingling and my fingers feel numb. It reminds me of the way I used to feel when I was inThe Nutcrackeras a kid. Complete and total stage fright.
I see Len leave the PL and Lauren following out behind. He says something over his shoulder, and Lauren laughs. Probably making fun of us.
“Shall we?” Charlie comes over, chewing a piece of blueberry bagel, so I know she and Olivia have made up.
“Mhm.” I stuff my bagel into my book bag and stand.
“Let’s roll,” Olivia says behind us, which makes Charlie immediately snap to attention. She tosses her red hair over her shoulder and slides her book bag on.
“Do you think we should try to get Len to join SAC?” Olivia asks. Charlie shoots her a look like,Don’t even think about it,and turns on her heel, the two of us following behind.
“I’m kidding,” Olivia says. She mouthsJesusto me and rollsher eyes, miming her best Charlie impression in a way that only people who have been friends as long as we have can. We walk out of the PL, across the breezeway, and down to assembly. The only thing I can think is that the second we walk through the doors, Rob will be there. And then, how completely and totally unprepared I am to see him.
Scene Three
If you’re a senior, likewe are, then you sit in chairs on the right-hand side of the auditorium during assembly, instead of up in the bleachers. Like by making it to senior year you have earned your right tosit in a chair. The whole thing becomes unbelievably political, with senior seats ending up like concert tickets. The chairs by the right far side and in the front are the most valuable and are reserved for popular people. The ones in the back and on the left are for everyone else.
Then there are the Trenches, which are on the other side of the bleachers, where people stand if they’re late. The Trenches are mostly for kids like Corey Masner, John Susquich, and Charlie’s ex, Matt Lester, who always vape before class and just can’t be bothered. It says something about you if youstand in the Trenches—that you’re not really a part of things, either because you can’t be or because you choose not to be. And in high school, honestly, they might as well be the same thing.
I look for Rob and finally spot him. He’s in the back row of senior seats, but on the right—solidly popular territory, his chair tilted backward—talking to Jake. The sight of him makes my heart and stomach do something very funny at the exact same time. He looks even cuter somehow. His brown hair is longer, a little bit shaggy, and although he’s sitting down, I can tell he grew this summer. And he’s tan. Probably from, you know, all the making out with other hot lifeguards on the boat dock. The image of Rob and some bikini girl locked in an embrace flashes on my frontal lobe, and I shake my head, trying to dislodge the picture.
“Loverboy looks good,” Charlie says. “Who knew he was so… manly?”
