His body was taut as he moved to stand by the full-length window, staring out. Anger smoldered from him like a burning cauldron. He hadn’t seen much, just the hand, just the figure. As if he felt my gaze on him, he turned and our eyes locked. And his eyes—his eyes were so dark it was like staring at an explosion of ink.
“I’m sorry,” I swallowed. “I didn’t mean to.”
Ethan’s brow flickered and the blue rushed back into his irises. He came toward me tentatively. “Don’t be sorry, don’t ever be sorry for what that bastard did to you.” He halted a few feet away.
That wasn’t what I meant. I meant I was sorry for not being strong enough. Which was stupid really; no one ever started out great at anything. They became great through hard work, determination, and refusing to give up.
My throat tasted of acid. It would be easier to give up, to try again tomorrow, but I said, “I want to try again.”
His brow knotted. “Are you sure?”
No. Hell no. If my shield faltered and he saw more—I nodded.
I took a deep breath as he placed his hands on the sides of my head. I raised the memory to my mind. I thought back to a time when my mother and father would take me horse riding. I was cantering through the meadow on a beautiful bay horse. I could feel his power under my legs, see the ripple of his neck muscles caught by the sunlight, feel the wind on my face. I felt joy, I felt safe, I felt free.
He moved his hands from my head and the vision ripped away.
“You like to ride?” he asked, stepping back.
“I haven’t been for years now, but my adoptive parents taught me. I forgot to block you. I got carried away in the moment. Sorry.”
His blue eyes studied me. “Why is it each time you have chosen animals?”
I stared out of the glass door into the forest. Cold prickled the nape of my neck. I had that inexplicable feeling of someone watching. Probably one of the guards. “Because animals don’t let you down. You know exactly what you are getting with ananimal. If you give it love, then it loves you in return. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had a bad day, or week, or month. If you look like shit, or if you aren’t the same species. Animals don’t try to hurt you.”
“Have you ever crossed a lion?” he responded lightly. “They will happily tear you to shreds, then eat you for dinner.”
My legs felt sweaty on the desk. I sprang off. “At least there are no nasty surprises with them.”
“There are no nasty surprises if you surround yourself with therightanimal, regardless of the species.”
“Put your hands on my head, vampire, and let’s get this done.”
Ethan’s eyes sparkled in the light. “I’ve been waiting for the moment you ask me to put my hands on you.”
I rolled my eyes. “Does everything have to be about sex with you?”
“I didn’t say anything about sex. Keep your mind out of the gutter, little witch. I may have meant all I want to do is hold you.”
I rolled my eyes again.
He gave me a cheeky grin as he placed his hands on the side of my head and the warmth rushed through me. I pictured the horse. Then imagined the shield rising. Locking. Immediately the pressure increased, became like walls closing in, squeezing. My head thumped painfully with every beat of my heart. The shield began to drop.
“Keep me out,” he snapped.
I gritted my teeth and scrambled to push it up. Searching for layers of iron to wrap, seal, protect. Sweat trickled down my back, my breathing became rapid, and the nausea reignited in my stomach.
His hands left my head and he stepped back. “Not too bad. That’s enough for the day.”
“No way,” I protested, wiping the sweat on my forehead. “You haven’t let me try to look into your mind.”
He arched his dark brows. “I said if you blocked me then I would let you look in my mind. You took me for a trip to the zoo.”
“You told me to show you first, then block you,” I reminded him. “One more try. I’ll put a vision in, and if you can’t see it, I get to play around in your mind.”
He ran his eyes over me, taking in my pale, damp face. “If we try one more time, you will vomit.”
I grabbed his hands and placed them on my head. “Give it your best shot.”
