“I have no problem with what I am. I know what’s in my heart, Monique, and I sleep well at night.” Instantly, I wanted to bite my tongue and tear that last line off. She knew about my nightmares, and I steeled myself for her smart-ass response where she pointed that out and made me look like a fool. But she continued across the room, behind the bar, reached into the cooler, unscrewed the top, and began to pour a glass of white wine.
“Now, now, children, I see you haven’t been playing well together while I have been away,” Ethan said, throwing his arm around my shoulders, as if this was nothing more than light-hearted banter.
Karson made a sound that was a cross between a grunt and a growl, as his eyes moved from Rodney to me. There was no guessing now; I was confident the person he wanted to strangle was me. “She may be a witch, but unlike most witches, she can’thideanything. Amelia struggles to conceal her emotions.”
“Yes, I see that,” Rodney answered casually as he moved behind the bar and poured a whiskey. “It won’t bode well for you in battle if they can read your every move.”
I wanted to tell him I didn’t want to fight, didn’t want to kill. I just wanted to live with love and peace and a sense of belonging. But he wouldn’t believe me, so I just gave him a tight smile and said nothing.
Chapter 45
Monsters In The Dark
“How many drinks have you consumed?” Karson asked after Ethan dragged Rodney outside to talk.
I looked out of the window into the dull of day. “Three.”
He frowned. “Are you sober enough to train?”
I was a little lightheaded, but he could drink an entire bottle of whiskey and not be affected, and I didn’t want to seem like a lightweight. “I’m fine.”
“Come.” He indicated with his fingers for me to follow. He walked to the top of the basement door and stopped in front of it.
Dread, thick and tight, balled in my chest. I shunted to a stop a few meters away. He must have taken in the look on my face, or maybe he heard my heart rate increase, because he said gently, “You need to face your fears.”
I folded my arms and shook my head, eyeing the door like it was about to jump out and bite me. “No one is going to take me to a basement.” Sarah did though, and it was terrifying. I didn’t die, however, even when it felt like I was going to.
“Perhaps, but if he or she locks you in a dark room or you find yourself unable to see, you’re going to have to learn to place your fear aside. You’re going to have to be able to think.”
He opened the door and flicked on the light. I edged closer and peered down—yellow swelled against the brick wall down the stairs. Below the light was a rectangle of black, like the walls were a coffin ready to seal me in. My body swayed, the same as if I’d looked down from a great height.
“Breathe, Amelia.”
I remembered to breathe.
This was the area where they’d locked Leon up and beaten him. My breath uncurled from my dry mouth, my heart thudding in my ears as an image struck across my vision. Hands on my arms and legs, dragging me down. It wasn’t a memory, even though it felt like one. It was a replay of a vivid nightmare.Not real, not real.
Karson didn’t say anything, he waited. It was my choice whether I went down or not.
I felt fear. I felt embarrassed.
I took the first step.
One.
Gray all around me swarming in my ears.
“Good.” His voice was steady, soothing, calm. He was beside me, would protect me. Not that I needed protecting. There was nothing down here but blood and wine.
Two, three, four, five.
“Hold her down,” the monster screeched. Cold hands on my ankles.
My legs stumbled; I shot out a hand against the wall.Not real, not real.
My chest became a brick. The walls pulsed as if they were alive. Light swayed against the darkness.
Six, seven, eight.I chanted the numbers of every step like a script that had to be read to ensure my absolution.
