“If I feed you, you might not want to drink.”
“I wish that worked.”
I placed them on my lap. “Where do you feed?”
“The girls I take home. I don’t only have sex with them.”
“And you mind control them to forget? The blonde last night?”
He nodded. His eyes stayed on the road. His brow furrowed.
I wondered if he thought I’d disapprove, be horrified by the news. I knew he had to feed, if he didn’t, he died. He had no choice.
“I guess they get a few more pricks than they’re counting on.”
He looked at me like he couldn’t quite work out what made me tick. Shook his head and blew out an amused breath. “I guess so.”
“Do they enjoy it?”
“Of course they do.” He grinned like a child.
“Not the sex Ethan.” I rolled my eyes. “The blood sucking bit?” I took a bite of the muffin, raspberry and white chocolate danced across my tongue.
“I mind control them to believe they do, but some girls do naturally. None that live here that I know of though, not that I’ve tried to find out the natural way.”
“I met a girl in the toilets at The Bite, she goes every week, she loves it, she told me.” I took another bite. “She said the bitemarks would be gone by the time she left, how do they heal so quickly?”
“We have venom in our teeth that can heal small wounds instantly.”
“Can you heal big wounds too?”
“I can’t, Karson can. But it would also turn you into a vampire. If we inject too much it paralyses you, and you die.” He glanced over at me, gauging my response.
“Why can’t you do it too?”
“I wasn’t born a vampire like him.”
“Did someone bite you?”
He threaded his fingers through his thick hair. “Karson did. I was near death, he saved me.”
“So why can he do it but not you?”
“We’re not sure exactly, it’s not like scientists study us. But we think maybe his venom is stronger and he needs to use less, or perhaps it’s a slightly different makeup. Maybe the human body can break it down quicker and convert it before they die. Others that weren’t born vampires rarely succeed.”
“What’s it like drinking blood—is it yummy?”
“Yummy?” He looked mildly amused, as quickly as it appeared the smile collapsed off his face. “It’s like drugs to an addict, except if we don’t get our fix we die.”
This question, it was apparent, was not much better. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. “Does anything help with the cravings?”
“Yes, alcohol numbs it.”
“Oh, I just thought you were an alcoholic.” I gave him a little smile. “Do you like it, being a vampire?”
“Yes, I wouldn’t want to be a fragile again.”
I asked the question of which the answer could be the catalyst to the greatest of pains. It had been spinning through my head since the first night I found out what they were. Plunged andburied beneath layers of concern and dread. The absence of answer allowed a counterfeit peace, an easier acceptance of what they are, of how they survive.
