He doesn’t believe me. I can hear it in the silence.
“Look,” I say, “if you don’t want to mention it to her, fine. I’ll find someone else.”
“No, I’ll ask.” He sounds reluctant. “But Marco, seriously. She’s my little sister. If you’re gonna hire her, it needs to be professional. No bullshit.”
“Of course.” My jaw is tight. “It’s a job. Nothing else.”
Nothing else.
Except I can still feel her under my hands. Can still hear the sounds she made. Can still taste heron my tongue.
Nothing else is the biggest lie I’ve told since Isotta died and everyone asked if I was okay.
“I’ll ask her,” Ethan says finally. “See if she’s interested.”
“Thanks.”
“Yeah. Hey, you good? You sound off.”
“I’m fine.” Another lie. “Just stressed about coverage. The nanny quitting thing, caught me off guard.”
“Right. Well, I’ll keep you posted.”
He hangs up.
I stand there in my kitchen with my phone in my hand and a sick feeling in my gut.
What the hell did I just do?
Jess Riley. In my house. With my daughter. Every day.
This is the worst idea I’ve ever had.
This is going to end in disaster.
This is going to rip open every scar I’ve spent two years trying to close.
But I can’t take it back now. The words are out there. Ethan’s going to ask her. She’s going to say yes or no.
And part of me, the part I’ve been trying to strangle since Vegas, is hoping like hell she says yes.
Because I want her here.
I want her close.
I want to see if last night was real or if I’ve finally lost my mind.
“Daddy!” Ben calls from the hallway. “I can’t find my shoes!”
“Coming.” I pocket my phone and head toward her voice.
One crisis at a time.
Find the shoes. Do the school run. Get through the day.
Figure out what the fuck I’m going to do about Jess later.
She probably won’t accept the job anyway.
