I thought we were just going to walk the perimeter!I want to shout, but bite my lips.
I fix my eyes on Marco’s back. On the way his shoulders move. On the exact spot between his shoulder blades where his shirt pulls tight when he turns to check on Ben.
Focus on that. Not on the trees. Not on the memories trying to claw their way up.
You’re fine.
This is fine.
It’s a park.
There are literally people jogging past.
I start counting. One, two, three. But it’s not the Brave Rules count. It’s far too fast.
One two three.
Start over.
One two three—
“Jess?”
I blink. Marco’s stopped walking. He’s turned back to look at me and his expression is unreadable.
Ben’s a few steps ahead, investigating a stick.
“You okay?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah, just—” I laugh, except it comes out too high. Too tight. “Just trying to remember if I locked my apartment door this morning. Total space cadet moment.”
He doesn’t buy it. I can tell by the way his jaw tightens just slightly.
But he doesn’t push.
Instead he says, “Ben, come back here. Let’s practice the hand squeeze.”
Ben trots back, Frederick swinging from one hand, stick from the other.
“What’s the Brave Rules squeeze?” Marco asks her.
“One, two, three!” She demonstrates on her own hand.
“Show Jess,” he insists.
Ben grabs my hand. Squeezes three times in steady rhythm. “One. Two. Three.”
And just like that, I can breathe again.
And I’m grateful.
I squeeze back. “One, two, three.”
We do it twice more. Then the breathing. “Smell the cocoa. Blow the steam.”
In through the nose. Hold. Out through the mouth.
The woods stop closing in. The panic backs off. My hands stop shaking.
