I am falling in love with my shadow
Chapter 19
Oliver
"In the hush between heartbeats, love is the gentle promise that even in lifes fiercest storms, two soulscan find shelter in each other's arms."
“Oliver!” Her screams are blaring over the sounds of all the other souls coming to the Americas. Ellis Island, though not beautiful to the locals, is a shooting star in the pitch-black skies that consume the lives of an immigrant. Germany’s threats of invasion brought to light an ultimatum I had to face and fast. Do I keep them here, where my protection over them can be broken with a simple piece of paper? Or do I act now and save them by giving up on the hunt for the very monster that slaughtered my best friend? My answer came in the act of putting them on a boat to the free world.
The condition of the boats from England to Ellis Island is crowded, unsanitary, and foul-smelling. The journey is long—I can’t tell you how many days have passed. Some poor wretches have atough time holding in what little food they have consumed, as the ship tosses on the rough sea.
With the cost of passage secured, our next step on this wild, split-second journey is getting to the port of departure. As we step off the boat, we take a deep breath, the air feels cleaner here—it’s less… dense than back home.
“He would have been so proud.” She looks around, and Charlie is playing with her silky brunette hair. Turning to look at him, she kisses his cheek—a faint lipstick stamp staining his skin. “Your daddy would have been so amazed.” The light from the afternoon sun glints off a tear forming in the crease of her eye, but she doesn’t allow it to fall. Looking up at me, “I don’t know what we would have done without you, Ollie.” The tear, defying her, submitting to the pull of gravity, plummets down her rose-kissed face.
“Charlie and you are family, love. Really, you’re the only family I’ve got.” I wrap my arm around her shoulder and tap Charlie on his nose with the pad of my forefinger—his giggle lingers as the memory fades into blackness.
The darkness persists—a reliquiae of memories that haunt and torment me. Charlie’s laughter bled into her screams, “Oliver, no. Hang in there. Please don’t leave us!”
It’s been so long since that night happened. Mere flashes are all I remember. The fall air was crisp—the scent of pine chasing its skirt-tails, the anniversary of my best friend’s death—right around the corner. For three years, I searched for the answers and investigated the evidence I gathered. I finally found out who did it, but I was too late—they got me, too. I would have never thought they would follow us, but that was my mistake… I let my guard down. Iheld on, pushed through the pain that blurred my vision. I had to get them out of that crowd—I had to gethimout.
Coming out of my daydream, my little bird is sitting on my lap, knife resting at my side. Her eyes are clouded with sadness. I can’t stand seeing her like this, all downcast while the thought of saying the wrong thing has her paralyzed. Moving my hand without thinking, I am stopped by the metal around my wrists, locking me in place.Damn it.
See-sawing my hips, with one jolt, I shift her, and she falls forward. Catching herself with her hands, I watch the sudden fear melt the moment her eyes meet mine. Slowly, I lick my lips, watching as her gaze follows the path of my tongue, “Don’t you have three more questions, dove?” I try to distract her mind and bring her back.
“Huh,” She wiggles. “What was that?”
“Your next question?” I fight to keep my arousal at bay. “Let’s hear it.”
“Where is my father? I thought he invited me here to help me find my sister?” Caught unaware by her sudden shift in topic, I stop to think—I must choose my answers carefully. It was one thing to tell her about the spiritual existence of the ‘being’. However, I am not overly sure that now is the best time to address the situation with her father. If she even gets the slightest clue, then she will leave me, and I will be doomed to walk eternity alone.
“He isn’t here. He… wanted those letters to be sent out, but he wasn’t expecting an answer so quickly.”
Her face twists. “Letters?” Tilting her head, she crosses her arms, eager for my response.
Shit, think, what do I say? The truth? No, then she will run. Half the truth? I may be able to manage that.
“Yes.” I start. ‘He wrote two… but I couldn’t find your sister, so I delivered yours.” I knew where her sister was. I visited the rehab center, that's when I overheard, Evelyn’s ‘puppy’ mentioning the plan he had for their escape. I was under the impression that I could save her, but I was quickly proven wrong. After hearing him, I washed my hands of the responsibility, giving him the room to be ‘provider’. I thought it best to go a different route—given my situation of being dead. So, I strategically planted the letter in her room for him to find.
Emory was already safe with Niven the night he had planned for the ‘prison break’—according to statistics, that center’s doctor-to-patient care was the lowest in the state. The kid pulled it off—he saved her. Not going to lie. I was. I am massively impressed with his execution of the whole plan.
Now, I know where she is and that she is safe, for now. The only thing left to work on is my character in front of Emory. When the time comes, I need her to choose me. Shemustchoose me.
“Next question?” I inhale deep, resetting my train of thought, “Also, while you are asking and since you have meticulously removed half my clothing, can you finish the job?”
“Maybe,” Remembering my mask is off, I smolder, “You can run that blade over my scars, like a good girl?”
She is fighting the enjoyment that ‘being in control’ is giving her. I can tell when a bite from the blade pressing between my bottom ribs makes me wince.
Ok, little dove... I’ll play.
“I told you before, my dove. I need release. This is the only way I can feel the remanence of the life I used to have. Oh, please… please… please,” I begged, watching her twitch with sexual frustration, “don’t be afraid to cut me.” I suck air in through my teeth, “it’s how I feel.”
The corner of her mouth twitches into a smile. “So, if I don’t like your answer-” Her pause is promising, I hang on to her words with an intense form of expectancy, “I can cut you?”
“If that-” I try to answer through my chuckling, “Is what you wish.”
Oh, fuck.What did I just say? The words flowed from my mouth, coerced by her seduction like acid in my mind—all rational cells dissolving to its touch.
