Wren walks out of the room, crosses the parking space and finds her car. She gets in, and I experience everything through her: the steering wheel under her hands, the seat beneath her, and the road ahead.
She finds a cheap diner and parks. Inside, she slides into a booth and orders toast, bacon, eggs, and black coffee. I taste everything she tastes as she eats, and I do my best not to react to it. Nothing is bad exactly… Maybe the coffee is too strong.
I let her eat for a while, but at some point, the silence becomes too much. It’s like we’re upset with each other. I’m not upset with her, but I’m pretty sure she’s still mad about the club and our spat last night. It’s grating at me, and I need to know that we’re good. I’ve never been a fan of the silent treatment. I don’t know how to give it, and I don’t react well to it when someone is icing me out like Wren is doing right now.
“How did you sleep?”I ask.
“Surprisingly well, considering everything.”
“I slept great,”I tell her.“Thanks for letting me share the bed.”
“It’s no problem.”
The conversation feels almost normal. Still awkward, but at least she’s willing to give me a chance when I initiate.
Wren finishes her coffee and pushes her plate away. She signals for the check. As she reaches for her wallet, I sense something. There’s pressure in her bladder. She needs to pee. Quite badly, actually. I can feel her deliberately ignoring the sensation as she pays and heads for the door.
The pressure in her bladder keeps building until it’s becoming uncomfortable for her. She’s trying to ignore it and walk it off.
I’m not sure how to approach this. On the one hand, it’s not my problem, but on the other hand, if she’s uncomfortable in her body, then I am too. If she can’t focus, that affects me. Or it’s more like… she can only focus on her full bladder, which in turnmakes me focus on her full bladder and everything that’s in… that general area of her body. Which is bad.
“You should use the bathroom,”I tell her like it’s no big deal.
Her mental voice practically shrieks at me.
“I can’t possibly!”
“Why not?”
“I’ll wait until we’re back at the motel. We can unmerge then and I can go in privacy.”
But I can feel she’s close to peeing herself.
“You drank a lot of coffee,”I point out.
She curses internally and I know she realizes I’m right.
“This is so embarrassing.”
“I do this with hosts all the time,”I try to reassure her.“It’s fine. It’s normal.”
“You see through my eyes!”
“If it makes you feel better, close your eyes.”
She’s silent for a moment, clearly mortified.
“Fine. I’ll pee with my eyes closed. But only because I’m about to burst.”
The conversation has shifted from awkward to almost amusing. She turns back and walks quickly to the bathroom. She goes into a stall and locks the door. I feel her fumbling with her jeans, pulling them down, sitting on the toilet. Then she closes her eyes.
It’s true that I can’t see, but I can feel everything – the pressure in her bladder, then the release as she starts to pee. The sensation is overwhelming. I feel the relief flooding through her and the way her muscles relax, the tension draining from her body. It’s strangely, intensely arousing.
I think about how fascinating it’s always been to experience what other species experience. I don’t eat food, but I can taste it through my hosts. I don’t drink, but I feel the burn of alcohol. I’ve unfortunately had hosts who did drugs, andthose experiences were unpleasant. But other things, like using the toilet… It’s strange and incredible to experience this kind of release when I don’t have such functions myself. My body doesn’t work this way. But through her, I feel it all.
I realize I’m terribly fixated on this. More than I’ve ever been with any other host. I can’t stop focusing on the sensation, the relief she’s feeling and how her body responds.
Then I become aware of something else.
