I drink an entire bottle of water before heading back out for another walk.
Moving around backstage with my hype playlist blaring through my headphones is the only thing that helps me clear my head.
I like getting a look at the crowd and watching some of the opening act. A few times, I’ve strapped on my bass and jammed with them if I know their music.
Maybe I’ll do that Saturday.
Tonight is too fucking nerve-wracking.
The opening band is taking down their set now. I pause in the wings, shadows falling over me, and turn the volume down in my headphones to get a better sense of the audience.
The house lights are on.
Fans are beating on the stage barrier.
My heartbeat begins to thud in my ears.
Young Decay.
Young Decay.
Standing here, I feel the tension from the crowd, and the familiar rope wraps achingly tight around my anxious muscles.
A group of people on the other side spot me. A woman in the front points and looks at her friends, prompting them to throw their hands in the air, screaming and shouting at me.
I take my hands from my pockets and flash the horns, and the group roars back.
Something about the exchange amps me up.
Let’s fuckinggo.
Young Decay.
Young Decay.
Reed is stretching on the ground when I reach the dressing room again. Bonnie is painting her lips black and checking her makeup one last time. Zeb is taking a single shot of vodka. He slaps the empty glass on the table twice and jumps a couple of times to shake out his nerves.
I grab my acid-wash grey jacket and put it on over my sweatshirt.
“How’s the crowd?” Reed asks from the floor.
I pull down my mask and grin at him. “Fucking magical,” I reply.
Reed hops to his feet as I take my tin from my bag and grab a single gummy out. Reed holds his hand out for one, and we cheer's them together before popping them into our mouths.
Another deep inhale fills me. I shake out the audible breath and crack my neck as the four of us circle in.
Young Decay.
Young Decay.
Three knocks sound on the door.
The stage manager sticks his head inside. “On in seven,” he says.
The crowd is so loud that we can hear them when the stage manager leaves the door open.
Reed and I exchange grins.
