“You need the hospital,” I tell her.
“No,” she says.
“Why?”
“Because youknowwhy,” she nearly snaps. “What—am I going to tell them someone on their fucking city council chased me into an alley, gashed me, and then tried to rape me? No. They’ll turn it around somehow. And if you’re with me, they’ll look at you. They’ll think I’m defending you. If one of them realizes who you are, if one of them knows your fath—”
She shuts her mouth tight and stares at me as if she’s regretting ever saying it out loud.
I sit back on my knees, my insides twisting. “Go ahead. Say it.”
Her throat bobs, and I can feel the shame rising in my body.
I scoff. “Dammit, Andi, don’t protect me from you, too,” I say, my tone soft. “Believe me, there’s nothing you can say that I haven’t heard.”
The beat of silence between us feels like an eternity, and I stretch my fingers to stay calm.
“People around here don’t know where you’ve been,” she says carefully. “They all think you’ve been in jail for fuck knows what, not touring the world as part of a highly successful rock band. They’re all too stupid to realize that not everyone turns out like their parents.”
I want to shove off the ground and pace, to wring my hands behind my neck and let my frustrations out behind the guise of a knife to my thigh.
Yet, looking at her, I feel that frustration wilt and turn into something ten times worse than rage. A burning sensation presses against my sinuses, and I avoid her eyes when I speak.
I thought I could handle the rejection.
I thought I was tough enough that if she realized what might happen if we went together, I could brush it off and not think anything of it.
God, this fucking hurts.
“James can take you, then,” I concede. I shift off of my knees and grab my phone, ready to dial and somehow keep myself from doing something incredibly stupid after she’s left.
“Maddox, that’s not what I meant—”
“It’s fine, Andi,” I say.
Why are my hands shaking?
“I only meant that I can’t see you taken away for something you didn’t do—something you wouldneverdo,” she says. “Maddox, please, hear me out. That’s not what I meant.”
But I’m too fucking stubborn to hear her.
“Maddox, hang up the phone,” she begs. “Maddox—”
“Yeah?” James answers.
She grabs the phone out of my hand and puts it up to her ear, and I don’t bother fighting her. I hear James speak again, though Andi doesn’t move her eyes from mine as she replies.
“Hey, James. Yeah—no, no, we’re fine. Just… we’re fine. We’ll see you tomorrow,” she says before hanging up.
Another moment passes, and I feel the tension between us coming to a head.
“If you’re ashamed of who I am, just say it,” I say, my heart breaking. “If this is nothing more than a week of wild sex for you, just fucking say it. If you think you can never be seen in public with me—”
“Maddox, you barely allow yourself to be seen in public,” she snaps. “What—are you thinking of letting go of your mask? Of letting the world see you for once? How can you accuse me of not wanting to be seen with the real you when you don’t even want to be seen with yourself?”
I fucking hate this.
“Maybe I am thinking of shedding the mask,” I say. “Maybe I had considered that if I had someone by my side who could look past how fucked up I am, I could free myself of that weight. Maybe…” I pause and twist in a circle, my hands running over my face.
