***
I never lost sight of my vengeance.
I spent days and nights plotting, making plans that would likely result in my death, but I didn’t care. That’s how reckless I was. That’s how blinded by revenge I was.
The uprising of the Walsh name and syndicate.
The silent echoes of their pain rolled over my spine daily.
I wanted revenge for my family, and it didn’t even register in my mind that the men who were hiring me were a part of the family that killed mine.
I just wanted to kill any part of the Irish/Italian mob, that I pulled the trigger without hesitation.
I was becoming powerful, talked about and sought after.
I’d had a lot of guns aimed at me over the years, lots of hits I was sent on that had men waiting for me. That meant there were lots of men that had missed and never woke up to tell the tale of firing on Micha Ragen. I was making my own name and slowly killing my mother.
Whatever it was he saw in me, in the way I looked down the barrel of a gun, was life-changing for us both. He gave me what I wanted, and I gave him all he had desired - safety and nights where he could finally sleep without fear of never waking.
I didn’t fear. As to fear you have to feel. To feel you have to be alive. To be alive you have to have a heart.
Nothing I possess.
It wasn’t until he sat with me talking that I came to hear by his mouth that he was indeed the younger brother of blue suit, the man who shattered my 12-year-old boy heart and broke my life into little un-fixable pieces.
He told me that it was solely out of greed. The same reason that he knows his brother is coming for him and his family.
Greed and dishonor fill the Gallo family.
He told me that blue suit is as ruthless as they come.
I am still young, thirsty and just as ruthless.
The ghost of my father guided me into this world of violence though, my brother’s voice loud in my ear. No one could intimidate me, and I wasn’t intimidated by him.
I’ve been made to be cruel and savage. Just what is required to win in this war.
He welcomed me into his circle, his brotherhood, with open arms.
I gained so much more than I ever thought I could by being a solider of his Mafia.
He helped me go from an angry, broken boy who sought death and blood like a nun sought out Christ to a conditioned beast.
I’ve had to climb my way up to be on the same level as any of the other soldiers that he has inside the House of Ragen. Now that I’m here, there’s no way I’m ever looking back. My cousin hates it because I am becoming more than what he ever will be. To be a god you have to be loved not feared.
I am both loved and feared. He knows it, he sees it, he hates it. His wife though, she loves it.
I am watching from afar as he panics and clutches for his reign to hold onto his little wifey.
I’m going to make them all pay for the deaths of my brother and father. Even the slow soul-shattering death of my mother. She pines for her family - her husband - and it kills me to see the empty that’s inside her eyes.
I watch my cousin and I see him whispering in the ears of men who don’t work within House of Ragen.
He pulled me up knowing straight away who I was and what I was doing. You see, some people pay attention, and some are just blinded by power and greed. My cousin is the latter.
He’s shown me what a quick kill does for your bloodlust; it only feeds it. The difference that he taught me is you don’t just want to feed it; you want to quench it, and I planned on it.
I want to bring down their whole empire.
