“You’re not gonna cry,” Trisha told herself. “You’re not gonna cry.”
She wanted to chuck the magazine, fling it across the room, but she just couldn’t stop staring at them.
“Don’t cry!”
It didn’t work. Tears streamed down her face and it wasn’t even the type of sobs she could mute. It was the ugly cry– the one that had mascara running down her face in thick, black streaks. Admittedly, she’d become an addict, buying every issue ofHot Gossipto torture herself. It wasn’t too bad at first, but the more she saw them together, the more obsessed she became. They were just so…cute.
Tyler wasn’t affectionate and yet they were always holding each other. He didn’t dance and yet she’d seen a picture of them dancing in the rain. He didn’t like public displays of affection yet there were dozens of pictures of them kissing. And this was the kicker, the thing that hurt the most. He was a serious man and yet they were laughing all the time.
Trisha had never wanted to change him. She loved him the way he was. In every relationship, each person always had little pet peeves about the other. Hers was that he never let loose. He never opened up, or talked about his feelings and eventually it got to the point where he was closed so tight, she felt like there was no room for her. She couldn’t keep giving so much of herself to a man who didn’t do the same. And even though it broke her heart to do it, she left, because she realized that he was never going to be that kind of man.
But now he was. He was that man…to Jordan.
When Tyler first started dating Jordan, Trisha had been certain that it wouldn’t last. But then she’d seen Jordan semi-naked at his apartment and that was an indication that there was something more. That brought out her bitchy side real fast. She’d called Jordan astandbyeven though she knew Tyler would never use a woman as a bed-warmer. Lashing out had been her only option. It was petty and stupid, but she’d wanted to transfer some of her hurt.
It was that grin on his face when Jordan came down the stairs, the look of complete fascination in his eyes as he watched her. That hurt her more than knowing they were sleeping together. In their three years together, Tyler had never looked at her like that. Not once.
She’d been at his side forthreeyears, through thick and thin, good times and bad. The ever-loving, ever-dutiful girlfriend. She took his lunch to the office every day. She cooked him dinner every night. She rubbed his shoulders when he was tired. She made sure her nails were always manicured, her hair was always done, her make-up was always perfect. She did her best to always look good for him and heneverlooked at her like that.
Another wail burst out of her. She couldn’t deal with this right now. The wedding was in exactly one month. December twenty-third was just around the corner and she needed to pullherself together. She needed to stop obsessing over what could have been with Tyler and focus on Oliver.
Oliver was a great guy. He made her happy. He was open and honest. He loved her with all her flaws, even during her bouts of bitchiness, which happened quite a lot. And she loved him. Up until a month ago, she hadn’t had a single doubt. She’d wanted to marry Oliver with all her heart, but now she wasn’t so sure. All these old feelings for Tyler were resurfacing and she was starting to question if she was truly ready to walk down the aisle.
She heard the front door open behind her and quickly wiped her eyes. She knew it wouldn’t help. Mascara stains were the devil, but she at least wanted to look the tiniest bit composed when Oliver saw her.
“Hey, babe,” he said, walking around the sofa to greet her.
He took one look at her and froze. His blue eyes moved from her to the magazine and he raked a heavy hand through his sandy brown hair. Letting out a deflated sigh, he lifted the magazine and sat down beside her. “Tyler and his new girlfriend getting you down?” he asked softly.
She shook her head, but couldn’t speak. Her throat was too tight to get a word out.
“They look really cute together.”
The ugly-cry face immediately took over and she burst into tears. His arm draped around her shoulder and he gave her a gentle squeeze. She nuzzled her face against his neck and for the first time in her life, she didn’t care that she looked horrid.
“Trisha?”
“Yes,” she squeaked out.
He cupped her face with both hands and tilted her head up until their eyes met. “You know I love you, right?”
She nodded.
“And you know from the first second I saw you, I wanted to make you my wife?”
She nodded.
“But now you’re not sure.”
“I-I am…Oliver, I’m sure.”
A sad smile curved on his lips and he slowly shook his head, his thumb tenderly stroking the tears off her face. “You’re not. These lips may lie, but those eyes don’t. We rushed into this. Two months and I got down on one knee. We were so happy, I thought you were over him.”
She choked on the words, but she managed to get them out. “We are happy…we’re still happy.”
“At this moment, you don’t look happy.” His blue eyes hazed with mixed emotions. “Trisha, when you walk down the aisle, I want you to be a hundred percent sure that it’s me you want.” He paused for a long time, thinking very carefully about his next words. “This is what I’m going to do. I leave for London in two days…and I won’t be coming back.”
“Oliver—”
