“When is this momentous affair to take place?”
“The ball is scheduled for the first week of April,” said Mrs. Bennet, though seeming less than eager to share the details.“The ball will be on the third, while the wedding will be the following Monday on the sixth.”
“Then might I be so bold as to claim your first two dances?” asked Mr. Collins, turning back to Elizabeth. “Though I must return to Kent Saturday next, I may return in time for the ball.”
Hosting the parson again was not agreeable to Mrs. Bennet, as evidenced by her pursed lips and flashing eyes. Mrs. Bennet showed a little restraint, however, and said: “Do you not suppose that a woman wishes to dance the first with her future husband at her engagement ball?”
“To be certain,” replied Mr. Collins.
So saying, Mr. Collins turned his expectant gaze back on Elizabeth, his zeal apparent though not understood. Again, Elizabeth looked at her mother, who regarded her father, who sat regarding the parson as if trying to make him out. Though uncertain how to respond, Elizabeth settled for blandness.
“If you will pardon me, Mr. Collins, I do not think it would be appropriate to promise those dances to you.”
“Oh, of course!” exclaimed the parson. “How silly of me to have forgotten that nothing is yet settled. I shall, of course, withdraw my request.
“Now, Cousin, what say you of nature? As I traveled to your father’s fine estate, I noted some fine examples of groves, the fields of plenty, and a stream or two, though they are nothing compared to those surrounding my patroness’s estate, of course. Kentisthe garden of England, after all—I am fortunate to live in such lovely surroundings.”
“I enjoy nature,” said Elizabeth, keeping her response brief to eschew inciting him. As he had proved many times, Mr. Collins needed no encouragement.
“Can you tell me more about your preferences? I noticed you walked this morning, though you were absent far longer than I might have expected.”
“Idolove to walk,” said Elizabeth, all she would say.
“That is pleasing to be certain,” replied the parson. “As my patroness has said, walking is a beneficial exercise. One cannot go amiss by maintaining one’s health by walking, eating sensibly, rising early, and leading a useful lifestyle. As a parson, I must suppose you understand I am engaged in the parish’s management and dealing with problems when they arise. A parson’s wife must also concern herself with such matters, for her active engagement is required to soothe bruised feelings and care for the less fortunate.”
“It has often been said that we must clothe the naked and succor the sick,” said Mary.
Though the girl injected her usual pious tone in her comment, Elizabeth noted Mary watching the parson as if to see what he would say. When she noticed Elizabeth’s scrutiny, Mary shrugged, though Elizabeth could not mistake the mischievous gleam in her eye.
“You see aright, Cousin Mary,” said Mr. Collins.
“Then it is not much different from what we do on the estate,” added Jane. “We care for those who farm the estate for our benefit.”
“Without a doubt, Cousin Jane,” agreed Mr. Collins. “Why, my excellent patroness is no stranger to such things, for she does not hesitate to resolve disharmony, feed the poor, and oversee all within the boundaries of her influence.”
While Elizabeth did not know the identity of the man’s patroness, she sounded like a woman who was more apt to browbeat and force those disruptive elements of her domain into harmony rather than mediate. The image of Lady Catherine de Bourgh, haughty and domineering, entered Elizabeth’s mind, and she stifled a giggle at the thought. No doubt, Mr. Collins’s patroness was the same sort as the infamous lady, rendering the position of Mr. Collins’s wife less desirable.
From there, the situation with Mr. Collins grew even worse, if possible, for the man continued to expend all his energy on speaking to Elizabeth, having no interest in anyone else. Several times, Elizabeth had the notion that he wanted to speak to her alone, as she construed his comments as intending to suggest they engage in private conversations. Kitty and Lydia appeared oblivious, but Jane, seeing something in the parson’s manners she did not like, stayed close to Elizabeth, as did Mary.
“I cannot say what Mr. Collins means by importuning you like this, Lizzy,” said Jane that day on a rare occasion when Mr. Collins was distracted. “It would be best if you were not alone.”
“Trust me, Jane,” said Elizabeth. “I cannot agree more.”
By that afternoon, Elizabeth was wild to be out of the parson’s company, and she even took herself to her room for a time in Jane’s company. Some might call it rude to avoid a guest in such a way, but Mr. Collins was becoming so blatant that she could not help but suppose it was best to be out of his company whenever she could manage it. The rest of the family thought nothing of it, agreeing with her assessment; what Mr. Collins thought on the subject became apparent when they gathered in the sitting-room before dinner that evening.
“Do you often spend the afternoon in your room, Cousin?”
Elizabeth regarded the man with distaste, certain he could see nothing of it. “Sometimes, I do, though not as a rule.”
Mr. Collins shook his head. “Then let me advise you to think better of it, for it is not good to be slothful. If you retire early, you will sleep enough, then you will be prepared for the day without the need to nap or waste time in other such frivolities. As you must remember, the wife of a parson must be engaged in the parish—to while away the afternoon in one’s room is not conducive to such activities.”
“Cousin,” interjected Mr. Bennet, appearing quite displeased, “there are yet some few minutes before we are calledto dinner. Please come to my study, for there is a matter I should discuss with you.”
For a moment, Elizabeth thought Mr. Collins would refuse. He thought better of it, for he regarded Mr. Bennet and then offered a slow nod. “Very well, Cousin. Yes, I suppose it is for the best that we discuss certain matters.
“Please excuse me, my dear cousin,” said Mr. Collins, rising and bowing low to Elizabeth. “Though I know you are impatient for my return already, I have some business to discuss with your father.”
“Do not hurry back on my account,” replied Elizabeth.
