“You’re being dramatic over one night.”
“It hasn’t been one night. Is there someone else?”
Now, I return his frustration. “Even if there was, we never agreed to be exclusive.”
“But we agreed to be honest. We’ve always had that. If you’re cutting me off for someone else, I should know.”
“You’re right.” I sigh and exit the highway. Eduardo is a decent man and a generous lover who has been nothing but good to me. He’s owed the truth. “I am interested in someone else.”
“Who?”
“It doesn’t matter. He’s a man I’ve known for a while. I want him, but he doesn’t seem to want me.”
“It’s this man’s loss,Cara. I’ll make you forget all about him.”
“I appreciate the offer, but it wouldn’t be fair to you. He’s in my head. Let’s take a break and just be friends.”
“No sexy times anymore?”
“I need space to figure my shit out, okay?”
“I’m not happy about it. But of course, I will respect your wishes. I’m here for you in whatever capacity you need.”
“Thanks, Eduardo,” I say, grateful for his understanding. “We’ll talk soon.”
I disconnect and wonder what is wrong with me. I’d just blown off a man I actually like for one I really don’t. I’ve never been so offended by another human being and yet wanted to climb all over him like a jungle gym. What kind of man kisses a woman senseless and rubs himself against her to prove a point? The kind of man I accused of being a misogynist with a small package. Okay, there is a rational part of my brain that can, maybe, kind of get why he’d reacted in angry defense. What I can’t grasp is why his response to me was that infuriating mix of hot and cold.
But whatever his deal, I just regret that I hadn’t been the one to stop things—the one to walk away. I wish I hadn’t been the one left dazed, confused, and humiliated…again.
* * *
“Ugh!” I protest into my pillow when the alarm sounds, and press snooze five times. Mornings are not my jam. I’m like those jalopies that have to be warmed up before they kick into gear. That means eating first thing; otherwise, I’m hangry, and no one wants to be around that, including me.
I nuke a few pieces of bacon and toast two Eggo waffles—like the ones my brother Jared and I used to have every Saturday while watching cartoons when our parents were supposedlysleeping in. We both knew what that meant. I was raised in a family where sex was openly talked about. My parents taught us to own our sexuality and respect our bodies. Although I struggled with the latter for a while, I don’t anymore. When I have sex with a man now, it’s because I want to.
I wolf down my breakfast, then make a single cup of Hazelino, doused with cream, and get ready for work. Talon still hasn’t responded to my messages. I don’t know if he intends to be at the project launch or not. But the show will go on, regardless.
I’m dressed and about to leave when there’s a frantic knock. I bite off a groan and open the door to my newest tenant, Carol Bates. She occupies one of the three apartments that I rent out. She’s a retired archivist who is a tad overbearing and neurotic.
“Hello, Miss Carol. Is everything all right?”
“Hun, I’m sorry to bother you. I can see you’re on your way out.” She pushes the bridge of her wire-rimmed glasses up her straight nose that matches her angular face. “The lock on the front door is broken. It won’t click into place. Anyone can get in. It’s not safe, especially for a woman living alone.”
This means me, since my other tenants are a married couple, a single man, and Miss Carol and her son, Freddy—who is in between jobs and came to stay with her a few weeks ago.
“I’ll call Phil right now,” I say, conveying my urgency, and take my phone out to contact my maintenance man. After explaining the situation, Phil confirms that he’ll be there within the hour.
“Thank you, Hun. This must be so much for you. Working full-time and managing the apartments.”
“I’m fine, Miss Carol.”
“Oh, I can see how self-sufficient you are. But no harm in having a man around. Freddy is good with his hands and could help you manage things.”
I hide my growing impatience behind a smile and opt for diplomacy. “I have a property management company, and Phil. I don’t need any more help at the moment.”
“Well, if you ever do, Freddy’s very reliable.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” I hitch the duffle bag with my soccer uniform onto my shoulder and grab the handle of my laptop case. “I have to run now, Miss Carol.”
