“That’s what your ass gets. You knew better than that,” I chastised her with a disappointed shake of my head.
I glanced up as Poppa walked up to us. He plopped down on my seat, lying over my feet. “What y’all talking about?” he questioned.
Toni grunted. “Yo’ ass nosy.”
He shrugged. “My best friend gon’ tell me anyway.”
Kemani grinned like a Cheshire cat. “Mhm, your best friend,” she mocked him.
He cut his eyes at Mani with a smirk. “Don’t start your shit.” Sitting up, he turned to me, “Anyway, I came over here to tell you the meat is finished.”
I nodded, placing my glass of wine down. I accepted his hand for him to pull me to my feet. I pulled my shorts out of my ass before following behind him. I could hear my sisters snickering behind me, and I turned around to flip them off.
Poppa tossed an arm over my shoulder that he used to pull me closer. I inhaled his scent, following his lead into the house. He assisted me with pulling out all the dishes I had waiting in various places. We had pasta salad, baked beans, mac and cheese, meatballs, dip, and some finger sandwiches. The men had cooked pork chops, ribs, steaks, hamburgers, hot dogs, and chicken on the grill, and there was enough to feed two football teams.
I was about to head out and call everyone in when my mother shimmied her way into the kitchen. She waltzed over to where I was placing the plates and plasticware for everyone to eat with. I held my breath while she went into the fridge to grab the pitcher of the margarita concoction. She placed it on the counter, then poured herself some. The silence was awkward because I could feel the criticism coming, kind of like how certain people could feel a storm in the air long before it broke. I could always tell when my mama was going to take it there.
“You and Lyrix were looking real cozy just now,” she noted, going for my jugular. I saw judgment in her eyes when I dared to look over my shoulder.
I waved her off. “We’re no cozier than we normally are, Ma.”
“Don’t get smart with me, Grai. My eyes work very well. I know you’re not shacking up in this man’s house. You already did that once, and it didn’t work out.”
I slammed down the pan in my hand, sending baked beans juice splashing up. I hissed as it burned my skin on contact, but it didn’t hurt any worse than what my mother said. Her words sliced through my confidence, leaving it completely in shreds.
At that moment, Poppa bopped in from the backyard, but he paused when he saw my mother and me in a stare-off. His facial expression turned serious, and his posture straightened as he came over to my side. All the adults came in behind him asif they were already planning to do so, probably to help take the food outside.
When he got in front of me, he palmed my cheek, forcing me to look at him. “What’s wrong?” I shook my head and tucked my lips before grabbing a paper towel to remove the baked bean juice. Even though I was trying to express one thing, I knew the fresh tears told him the truth. He scowled. “What she say?” he barked.
I sniffled and wiped my eyes. “Nothing, Lyrix. I’m fine.”
He was shaking his head in protest before I could even fully get the words out. “No, you’re not, and see, I was going to wait to address it another time, but right now seems like as good an opportunity as any.” I reached for his arm, trying to stop him before he spun around to face my mother. It was no use; he was thirty-eight hot. “Did you call her and my boys a burden again?”
Tension swelled in the room as all eyes turned to my mother. My father stepped closer to her. “Did you say that, baby?” he asked with a disappointed look.
She scoffed. “He’s blowing it out of proportion. I simply advised Grai to not get in the habit of letting men take care of her. She needs to learn to stand on her own two feet instead of hopping from man to man.”
My muscles tightened behind Poppa, and I realized that it was a mistake. He balled his hands into fists. “So, it’s perfectly okay for you to be taken care of by a man but not your daughter?”
Mama Dee stepped forward. “Watch your tone, Lyrix Alexander Mercer,” she chastised him. “Be respectful.”
He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Ma, but I’m fed up with her judging Grai. Every time she does it, it fucks her up. I offered my home to Grai and my boys because that is what I wanted to do. It was the best decision to give her a chance to focus on healing without the concern of figuring out what was next. Being herewith me is the safest place for her and those boys. You should’ve been rejoicing that I opened my home to them, not making her feel bad about it. You know me. You know I only have their best interests at heart. Respectfully, I would like you to stop questioning that and let us be happy with what it is. All the extra shit ain’t necessary.”
Everyone had shocked expressions at Poppa’s outburst. It was clear he’d been holding that in for a while. Mama Dee cleared her throat and shook her head. “See, you done pissed my baby off. You are wrong, Tracy,” she said, addressing my mother while taking her son’s side.
Poppa didn’t wait around to see what she said back, because he took my hand and escorted me out of the kitchen. I silently followed him up to his bedroom, where he slammed the door shut. He turned to look at me with a fierce expression.
“I’m okay,” I assured in a shaky voice before he could even ask. Under the fire was his concern for me. It was always there in the melting pot of emotions swirling in his eyes. I tried to plaster on a smile, but the longer he stared at me, the harder it became to pretend.
Just as my mask began to slip, he closed the distance between us to scoop me up in his arms. There, against his chest, I crumbled from the weight of my mother’s judgment. All I ever wanted was love. Why couldn’t she see that? Why couldn’t she see that this was hard on me? Why couldn’t she see that I had to drag myself out of bed every day because right now, the only thing I had to live for was my boys?
Poppa massaged my scalp while littering the sweetest kisses to my forehead. Each one was feather light, yet they were the furthest thing from being weightless. His grip on me tightened, and I knew the last thing he wanted to do was let me go. If ever I had a problem that he had the means to solve, he would. That was why it warmed my heart to hear him defend me sopassionately. If I had no one in this world, I had Lyrix, without a doubt.
Thinking on his rant had me snickering. “Period, pooh,” I said jokingly. “You told her ass!”
He mushed my head to the side and released me with a chuckle. “Shut up, goofy. You good?” He paused, tilting his head slightly to the side. “You know what? You gotta be good ‘cause listen. They playing our song. Fuck whatever your mama was talking about, and be here with me.”
I paused to hear the sweet sound of Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” spilling from the speakers in the backyard. He held a hand out for me. I happily accepted, allowing a genuine smile to spread across my face seconds before I slammed into his rock-solid chest. I made the mistake of looking up into his brown eyes and suddenly couldn’t look away to save my life.
