“You’re not so bad yourself, Santa.”
* * *
After breakfast,Tom dropped Randall off at work.He went back to his apartment to shower and get dressed.He watched TV, but his mind kept drifting off to the man behind Hot Mall Santa.He thought about their conversation, about the excitement in his voice when he shared presidential trivia, about his quest to find his calling.And that silly guffaw laugh.Like a Transformer action figure Tom had watched two moms wrestle over in the wee hours of Black Friday years ago, there was more to Randall than met the eye.
Tom went to work a little early so that he could make a cameo at Santa’s Workshop.He had to park in the back rows of the massive parking lot.He thought he might hit 10,000 steps on his Fitbit walking from his car to the mall.When he got to the South Wing, a security guard stopped him.
“Are you shopping or visiting Santa?”she asked in an authoritarian voice that matched her black-and-grey uniform.
“Santa?”Tom said meekly.
“You need to get a ticket.”She pointed to the kiosk just off to her right, which had once sold cell phone cases, but was now repurposed into a Santa’s Workshop admission station.
“Do I have to pay to see Santa?”Tom asked.
“No, it’s still free, but now you have to sign up for a time.It’s gotten very crowded, and it’s about to get even more packed after the story,” the woman said.
“What story?”
* * *
“He’s goingto be on the news?”Kirsten yelled for the whole Décor Store to hear, even though they were in the break room.She nearly knocked over her Snapple.Tom kept it from falling off the table.
“That’s what the woman told me.WACL is doing a report on Oakville Mall’s sexy new Santa for the six o’clock news.”Randall’s presence had gone viral.People posted pictures online, tweeted about him, and news spread.The mall knew the WACL story would be the tipping point.Crowds would become tidal waves of people.It sent a knot of stress tangling in his chest and stomach.
“So Hot Mall Santa is going to be a full-fledged celebrity?”she asked.
“I guess so.”
“Who knew Oakville Mall would become famous for something other than the guy who drove his car through the Aeropostale?”
Tom pushed Kirsten’s feet off the extra chair and sat down.
“This is awesome,” she said.“You seem stressed.”
“I do?”
“Yeah.Your shift hasn’t started yet.”She leaned forward and put her hands on his shoulders.“It’s going to be okay.The store will be extra packed thanks to Hot Mall Santa and Julie Who Cares, but in two weeks, it will all be over.”
Tom nodded, letting her think that’s what actually bothered him.He doubted Randall would want anything to do with him now that he was going to be famous.He was Tom’s celebrity crush, and celebrity crushes never worked out.Save for Hugh Grant inNotting Hill.
She offered him some of her Oven-Baked Lay’s.He politely declined.
“Can you imagine all the people who will be hitting on Hot Mall Santa?”she said with a far-off look.“There will be ladies and gay guys who will be giving him actual lap dances and slipping him their number.Depressed, rich housewives will offer him thousands of dollars to have sex.It’s going to be insane.”
“Insane,” Tom repeated, with a hole gnawing inside him.
“Unless he has a girlfriend.Did he mention anything to you about dating someone?”
“No,” he said and left it at that.
“All these hot guys usually have a girlfriend.Their high school sweetheart or someone like that.And they’re all beautiful and blonde.”
Tom picked at his dirty blond hair.
Kirsten took a bite of her orange chicken from Panda Express.She and Tom had a deal in place that come January, they would bring in healthy lunches for work.They did it every year and never made it past the tenth.
“Although I feel bad for whoever she is.”
