The way he looked at me was like he was at peace. He’d reconciled all the doubt in his mind and had found perfection. Or maybe I was projecting because that was what I was feeling.
Either way, our world had changed.
Finally.
12
WEST
The late afternoon sunlight streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow over the living room. I lay on the couch, my body pleasantly sore and thoroughly satisfied, with Drew draped over me, his arms wrapped around my back. Our legs were tangled together, skin on skin, as we basked in the afterglow.
We’d spent most of the night and day in each other’s arms. I’d lost count of how many times we’d made each other come. I’d fallen asleep with Drew in my arms, only to wake up with him spooning me and grinding his hard cock over the ridge of my ass.
After that first kiss yesterday, it was like something had been unleashed. Something we couldn’t control. I’d been so beyond needy for Drew it was a surprise we’d gotten up for breakfast or had showers in between the various rounds of sex.
Well, we’d had sex in the shower too. Another one of those moments I’d dreamed about and where reality had turned out to be so much better.
My laptop lay abandoned on the coffee table. We’d spent a few hours contacting the insurance company and figuring out the next steps for the Foundation. I’d worried the old partof the building wasn’t up to code, but the insurance company reassured me it was all still covered. I wasn’t ready to go back to the building, but I’d been informed it was secure and the main part hadn’t been damaged. The fire department was still investigating the cause of the fire, but if I had to place a bet, I’d say it was old wiring.
When it had all felt too raw and upsetting, we’d lost ourselves in each other again and again.
But we hadn’t talked. And that was bothering me.
I gazed into his blue eyes, mesmerized by the tiny flecks of green I’d never noticed before but now danced in the fading light. His light-brown hair was even more tousled than usual because I couldn’t stop running my fingers through it. A soft smile played on his lips as he leaned into my touch.
God, he was beautiful.
The comfortable silence stretched between us, filled with unspoken words and lingering touches. I traced lazy patterns on his back, marveling at how right this felt. How perfectly we fit together. Just like I knew we would.
I cleared my throat, breaking the spell. “Drew, I…” I started, then paused.
There was a slight tremor in his body and a quickening of his heartbeat.
“What is it?” he asked, propping himself up on my chest with his hands under his chin.
I took a deep breath as his eyes searched mine.
“We need to talk about this. I’ve wanted you for so long,” I confessed, my voice barely above a whisper. “You have no idea how many times I’ve dreamed of holding you like this.”
“Me too. The first time I popped a boner when we were messing around in the park, I thought I was a freak. You were my brother,” he said. “I hid it and never talked to anyone about it.Then it happened around other boys, so I figured I was definitely gay, but it was different around you. I hated myself for it.”
I cupped his cheek, overwhelmed by the vulnerability in his admission. “Oh, baby,” I said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his lips. “I felt the same way, and I was just as scared.” I pulled back slightly, my hand still resting on his cheek. “No, not scared. I was terrified,” I admitted, my voice low. “The thought of losing you, of ruining what we have…it paralyzed me.”
“I know. God, West, I was afraid I’d be taken away.”
I let out a shaky breath. “We’ve been through so much together. The foster system, all those nights wondering if we’d ever find a real home…” My voice cracked, and he rested his cheek on my chest.
“You became my home,” he murmured into my skin.
I nodded again and kissed his hair, fighting back tears. “Exactly. And the idea of jeopardizing that? It felt like the biggest risk in the world.”
“I hated your first boyfriend. I wasn’t that keen on the second one either. They had something I wanted even if I thought how I felt was wrong.”
I smiled. “We were just teenagers figuring ourselves out. I never felt for them an ounce of what I feel for you. The first blowjob I got, I closed my eyes and pretended it was you. When I came and opened my eyes and saw the other guy, I freaked out because I thought I’d cheated on you but also because wanting him to be you was wrong.”
“I lied about when I lost my virginity,” he chuckled, but it sounded like it was stuck in his throat. “I was twenty-one, and you had a boyfriend. The first one who sounded serious. I went to a club and hooked up with a random guy that looked like you. Tall, strong, curly hair.”
I never had a boyfriend that was serious. Or a boyfriend. Period. They’d just been hookups. Bodies to take the edge off soI could function again around the person I really wanted. Maybe I’d made them out to be more to protect myself from acting on my feelings and losing my best friend.
