“She’s naturally upset, but not like other times. Maybe she’ll talk more in the morning once she’s rested.”
I give Sylvie a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you for doing that. I’m sure I’m the last person she wants to see right now.”
She pats my arm. “At this age, they’re too old for everything until they need some comfort, and then they’re not too old. She’ll come around and understand you’re only trying to protect her.”
“Thank you. I’ll admit I’m a little lost here. I’m being pulled in all directions, and whichever decision I make will hurt someone.”
“My dear, make the decision that won’t hurt you because you can’t control how anyone else feels about it, but if you’re happy, you can help them understand.”
Her words stay with me, and they’re what I go back to when after a few days, the calls from the press keep coming, Daisy is pushing me to make a statement, and Kay still isn’t talking to me unless she absolutely needs to.
“I haven’t heard you talk about Tyler once since we arrived,” Bastian says when we’re alone in the barn.
“I think I saw him and Seymour kiss when he left the stage. Everything went down with the paps as I was looking for him.” I brush the excess hay into a corner. “Truth is, it isn’t a conversation I want to have over the phone.”
“Have you spoken to him at all?”
“No. He’s called a few times, but I haven’t picked up." I sigh. "I’m such a dick, aren’t I?”
He raises a brow. “Look at it this way. The gig ended, and we disappeared. He’s probably worried sick.”
“You’re right. I’ll finish this, and then I’ll call him back.”
We’re about finished cleaning the barn when Nikko comes running in, out of breath.
“Kay’s gone.”
“What do you mean gone?” I shout, feeling like a hole is opening under my feet.
“Sylvie called her to help bake a cake to get her out of the bedroom, and she didn’t reply. After we checked the room and she wasn’t there, we looked everywhere. I went back to the room and noticed her backpack she hangs on the chair by the desk is gone and so is her coat.”
No.
I fall to my knees. This can’t be happening.
32
MIK
THEN
“Thor,you look like you saw a ghost,” Stone says as the door to our dressing room closes behind me.
“I just need some sugar. This tour is kicking the shit out of me,” I say, heading over to the table with all the food. Of course, I’m lying, but I hope neither catches it.
I grab a piece of fruit and start eating, even though it tastes like cardboard. If they see me acting semi-normal, I might have time to get my thoughts in order before they figure out what’s wrong. Or before we have to go out there and meet the fans.
I try to think of the last time I looked into Tyler Shaw’s eyes. He’d asked me to go all the way.
That night I thought we would. God, I wanted it so bad. But it wasn’t the right time. I knew it even then. Our first time going all the way would have to be special.
We’d take our time teasing and tasting each other. We’d fight over who got to be first to bottom. I’m sure we’d use too much lube or maybe not enough. We’d mess everything up, and we’d laugh about it. It would be absolutely fucking perfect.
Why the fuck am I thinking about this now?
It probably wasn’t even him. All the times I’ve reached out only to get a dial tone or nothing. No call back, nothing.
Why would he come to the gig ten years later? It makes no sense.
