He laughs.
"You left me once because of what you thought you heard. I'm not going to sit here waiting for the day you come to the realization this is not what you want and you leave again. I'm done with everyone else running my life and my heart. From now on, if my life goes to shit, then it goes to shit on my own terms."
"That's not fair, Sky."
"Life isn't."
I don't understand what's happening right now, but there’s one thing I do know.
"If you don't already know what I want, Sky, then maybe my place really isn't here."
I turn around and leave, hoping my parents are already asleep so I don't have to talk to anyone because I don't think I can.
I try to make sense of things, but it's too hard to separate Sky's hurtful comments and the other stuff he told me.
His dad gambled again. Okay, but why can't we have Maple Sky and expand his business? Isn't Miles coming back soon?
My head hurts, and I just want to get under a blanket and cry.
When I look at my phone to set my alarm for the morning, I see the photo I took of Sky and me in Tuxbury. I was trying to take a nice photo, but at the last minute, he licked my face, so we ended up with this weird photo of my scrunched-up face with his tongue flat on my cheek.
I ran once when I misunderstood the situation, but I'm not running again. When we can have a sober conversation, if he still doesn't want me, if he still doesn't trust me to look after him the way he looks after me, then I will accept that we're over.
Until then, whether he likes it or not, he's mine. But I do hope he wakes up tomorrow with a killer hangover for making me sneak into my parents' house in the middle of the night rather than cozying up to my boyfriend after a good orgasm.
30
Skyler
My head is killing me, and my bladder insists that I need to get up.
I reach over to complain to Jud about the unfairness of my life, but he's not there.
Everything comes rushing back at the same time my stomach decides it doesn't like me, and I barely make it to the bathroom before I throw up.
I empty my bladder and then reach out for the toothbrush and mouthwash.
Jud's toothbrush is there right next to mine.
I ignore it because I can't think about last night yet. Not before I have a shower and coffee.
And because I'm a coward who's afraid he's screwed up all the good things in his life, even after the shower and coffee, I still avoid thinking about what I said to Jud. How I pushed him away.
He's probably on a one-way flight to Europe to follow his dreams while I'm still stuck here.
Dammit. So much for not thinking about it.
I get in my truck and drive to the farm
When I arrive, I hear noise in the barn, so I know my dad isn't in the house. I don't particularly want to spend any time with him today, so I go in the house to say hi to my mom first.
"Morning, honey. I made you pancakes."
"Hey, Ma." I kiss her on the head and sit at the table. My mom's cooking must be magic because my stomach has decided to get up for pancakes. She puts a cup of fresh coffee in front of me and sits down at the table.
"I did a lot of thinking last night after you left," she says.
"Uh-oh, are these pancakes safe?"
