"I do. She's an old lady, but she's never let me down."
We get the helmets on, and then I straddle the bike, giving enough space for Jud to get behind me.
I've never had anyone on the bike with me, and now I know why. The roar of the engine, the bumps in the uneven terrain, and Jud pressing his body against mine are a recipe for disaster, and I'm not even a chef.
Fortunately, by using the bike to get around, we arrive at our destination within a few minutes.
My parents' land has been passed down for generations on my mom's side, but the part we're in was bought by my grandparents, who were hoping to have a big brood and wanted plenty of space for all of their children to be able to build their own houses on the land.
The brood started and stopped with my mom, and after taking over the farm with my dad, my parents were so busy running it on their own that they didn't have much time to work out what to do with the land that wasn't used.
Jud gets off the bike, holding onto my arm for balance, and then I do the same, making sure the stand is in place so the bike doesn't topple over.
"What is this place?"
"We're at the edge of the property. Miles found this place years ago. He was doing a project for school, mapping the land and all the interesting features." I point to the far distance. "That's Mt. Mansfield."
Jud gazes at the view, and I know he sees exactly what I saw the first time I was here. This is Vermont. Trees as far as the eye can see, snowy peaks in the distance, and it's so peaceful you're almost afraid to say anything aloud that will disturb the magic of the place.
"This is where Miles is going to build his house," I say, pointing at the various wooden stakes Miles and I stuck in the ground to mark the boundaries of the house when he was last here.
We spent days coming here to catch the sunrise and the sunset to maximize sunlight in the house once it's built.
"How about you?"
I look at Jud. He's next to me in a light jacket because it may be spring, but this is still Vermont, and his hands are in his pockets. The way the sunlight hits his face makes his blue eyes brighter.
"When he's back, I'll move to the cabin permanently. That's my home. I don't know how to explain it, but I like it there among the trees. I feel more peace. In some ways, the two places aren't all that different, but here, all I feel is this weight pulling me down."
"At your place you have control over what happens. No one can let you down."
He does it again. Just like at the burger place, Jud sees through me better than I could if I was staring at myself in the mirror.
Does he see other things too?
"Come, I want to show you something else."
He follows me in silence, and I lead him through the trees. Once we get to the right spot, I let him pass me.
My eyes stay on his face as we turn the corner and he sees row after row of cherry trees.
His face lights up with the biggest smile possible as we walk to the middle of the orchard, where there's a strategically placed old tree log.
"I…I have no words. Sky, this is beautiful."
Weeks ago, the trees were full of bloom, but now the cherries are only a few weeks away from harvest, so there aren't as many blossoms.
"It's pretty impressive, isn't it?"
"I bet you bring all the boys he—" he trips on a small rock because he's still wearing my oversized boots.
I grab his hand just in time to stop him from falling, but I accidentally pull him with a little too much force, and he ends up facing me, chest to chest.
There's a battle going on inside me. My heart and my brain are at odds with each other, and I don't know which one to listen to.
Jud's eyes focus on mine before they travel down, and my resolve is broken as I close the distance between us and press my lips against his.
He's soft and warm. This feels so fucking right, and I haven't even tasted him. I pull away reluctantly and rest my forehead on his as I answer him.
