Victoria comes back with a bowl of soup. It smells nice, but I'm not sure my stomach is up for it.
"You know Annie makes the exact same face when she thinks she's not going to like the food I give her?"
I snort, but don't miss how she refers to her as Annie.
"Spoiler alert, she always likes it."
I follow as she places the bowl on the side table. It's steaming and it does look delicious.
"Why don't you take a shower while the soup cools down a little. You'll feel a lot better for it."
"Thank you, Victoria. I think I might do that. And thank you for checking in on me."
In the last few days, despite being in and out of consciousness, I've noticed Victoria relax more and more around me. The maternal side of her that I've always seen with the twins seems to have extended to me, and if my heart wasn't already fully broken, it would break all over again, but in this case, in a good way.
She runs her hand over my forehead and pushes my curls back.
"Don't worry about washing up. I can do it when I come back later, okay? Just rest some more."
I nod, a small lump forming in my throat.
I'm not going to cry, I'm not going to cry.
Victoria leaves the cottage, and I take her advice. The shower does leave me feeling refreshed, even if I'm still so tired. I've been in bed for four days, and I feel worse than after a week of working on the farm.
The soup is surprisingly good, and for the first time in days, it stays down. I follow it with some crackers, just in case, and because eating takes so much out of me, shortly after putting the plate aside, I fall asleep.
A knock on the door wakes me up, this time from a deeper sleep. Is it dinner time already?
It's still light outside. I look at the clock on the bedside table and it's only four in the afternoon, so I've been asleep for about three hours.
There's another knock on the door. Did Victoria forget her keys?
I get up slowly, not bothering to put on a robe, and open the front door.
Because I assume it's Victoria coming back, I don't even look before leaving the door open and turning to go back to bed.
"Ash, are you okay?"
My head suddenly feels too dizzy. I try to hold on to the wall, but the wall isn't there as my legs fail me and my whole body goes down. I know I land on something soft, but I can't tell what. The same voice reassures me I'll be okay before everything goes dark. Xander.
When I wake up again, I feel warm and rested like I've slept for a day straight. I try to stretch, but something pulls on my hand, so I open my eyes. There's a tube running from my hand with a see-through liquid going in. I try to remove it.
"No, please don't take it off. It's only saline to hydrate you."
"Xander?"
He sits on the side of the bed and runs his hand over my hair. I move my head away and he takes his hand back. "What are you doing here? You need to go."
I'm glad I'm feeling better because I don't know if I can handle Xander or send him away if my head goes funny again, and my stomach gets queasy.
"We need to talk, Ash, but first, you need to tell me what happened. Why are you sick?"
"I have the flu because I walked in the snow last week. Look, I'm sorry I didn't go to your apartment after my party, but I…I think we need to stop seeing each other." I turn to the other side because having him here, and at a time when my body and my emotions are all over the place, is more than I can bear.
"Why?" His voice is so calm and collected, and I remember it's not because he feels sorry for me, it's because he feels nothing. I was just a toy, right?
"Let's just say your fiancé clarified a few things for me."
