Chapter Fifteen
David
Two things happenedwhen I heard the sound of keys and the voice of my aunt already inside the apartment. I froze and then shoved Joel off me like he was cursed. One moment I was sucking his sweet lips, feeling more content than I ever remember, and the next it was like a bucket of freezing water was emptied on my head, drenching me head to toe.
I don’t think I moved an inch in the three minutes my aunt was in the apartment. Not that she noticed. She’d come in full of happiness and love, intent on giving us a packed lunch for the trip, unknowingly leaving behind tension and uncertainty.
I’d only given Aunt Teresa the emergency key with strict instructions to never use them except for emergencies. In the last nine years after changing the locks, she’d only ever let herself in when I was sick. I didn’t even realize she carried the key with her.
My reaction had been involuntary, the result of a lifetime of hiding who I am. So much had happened in the last twenty-four hours, and I hadn’t even begun to make sense of what it would mean to me, let alone how it would affect the chain of actions that could potentially result in me coming out to my family.
Fuck, I hadn’t even had the chance to ask myself why the thought of coming out to my family was starting to wiggle its way into my mind. Nothing had changed. My uncle still hated me because he suspected I was gay, and my aunt didn’t have a clue. And Joel?
Joel was going to be here for five minutes, and then he would return to America, leaving me behind once again.
Joel’s movement as he got up and grabbed the dishes from the table woke me from my whirring thoughts.
“Joel, I... I’m sorry.” I reached for him, but he moved out of the way toward the sink.
“Don’t worry,” he said flatly. His actions were a contradiction to his voice because he was scrubbing the plates like they had a week’s worth of dried-up food on them.
“Joel.” I grabbed his elbow to turn him to me, dried his hands with a dishcloth, and held them to my chest, not letting him go.
“Joel,” I said softly, “I’m sorry about how I reacted. I was startled because my aunt has never come into the flat unannounced in the nine years I’ve lived on my own.” I let out a breath. “I just told you my biggest secret, and... and we had sex, and you know I’m not out, so all of it just made my brain kind of short-circuit and—”
Joel’s lips cut me off in the nicest of ways.
God, how I loved his lips.
He dropped his hands to my waist and held me close before letting out a breath and then speaking.
“I understand. I can’t say it didn’t sting when you pushed me away from you, but I get it. You should come out to your aunt when and if you’re ever ready. And definitely not while I’m spider monkeying you.” He laughed.
To say I was relieved was an understatement. I had this overwhelming feeling I was on the brink of something in my life. Like I was on the edge of a precipice, and while I was deciding whether to jump or not, something was bound to come along and push me anyway.
I had no doubt the next few days were going to be amazing but also challenging; however, for now, I decided I didn’t want to think about it. I just wanted to kiss the amazing man my best friend had become and then go on holiday.
“Hmm, baby,” Joel said breathlessly, withdrawing his lips from mine, “we kinda need to get on the road.”
“I know, but here I get to do this”—I pulled him even closer so he could feel how my body reacted to his pressing against me—“and this.” I let my hands slide southward to grope his perfect ass.
Joel let out a groan and reluctantly put some space between us. “If we leave now, I promise we can do more of this later.”
“Why wait for later when we can do it right now?” My question remained unanswered as I peppered Joel’s neck with light kisses while my hands went on an expedition around his body.
Despite his previous statement, Joel declared that there was absolutely no rush to leave, making me laugh against his warm skin.
We’d ended up going back to the bedroom where he decided he would show me exactly what he’d wanted to do to me the day we filmed the chocolate salami recipe.
“Don’t move,” he commanded as he pushed me against my bedroom door. I couldn’t not obey since I was in a desperate state of arousal and would do anything if it meant he’d get his hands on me again.
“When you looked at me that day, I felt it everywhere,” he said, spelling out each syllable.
“Your eyes looked like they could taste me from afar.” His hands held mine against the door as he nuzzled my neck and bit the lobe of my ear, causing me to let out a frustrated groan.
“Huh, you were so fucking sexy, Joel.” My words were strained, and I was desperate to move, to grind against him and find some relief. “I wanted to be that chocolate. I wanted to make you moan in the same way.”
“Oh, you do, baby.”
