“Jordan.” Her voice stops me at the hallway entrance. “We should probably talk about what just almost happened.”
But Henry’s cries are getting louder, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that conversation yet.
“Tomorrow,” I tell her. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”
As I head toward the guest room to take care of Henry, I can’t stop thinking about how close I came to kissing her. How much I wanted to kiss her. How much I still want to kiss her.
And how complicated everything is about to become.
CHAPTER 20
ALEXA
Sunlight streams through my bedroom window, but I’ve been awake for at least an hour, staring at the ceiling and replaying last night’s conversation. Everything about Jordan makes sense now. The careful distance he maintains, the way he sometimes seems to shut down when things get too comfortable, the guardedness that I mistook for coldness.
He’s been protecting himself. Just like I have.
But last night, I saw beneath all of that armor. I saw the tenderness he tries so hard to hide, the vulnerability he’s spent years learning to mask. When he told me about Amy, about growing up in foster care, about feeling like he has to carry everything alone, I saw the real Jordan. Not the polished doctor or the competent temporary guardian, but the man who’s been fighting to belong somewhere his entire life.
And the way he looked at me when we almost kissed… There was something there. Something real and deep and worth exploring.
I’ve spent the last nine years building walls around my heart, telling myself that Ash and I are better off on our own. Butmaybe it’s time to take them down. Maybe it’s time to see where this connection with Jordan could lead.
The thought terrifies me and thrills me in equal measure.
I can hear Ash in the living room, the familiar sounds of his video game providing background noise to my morning revelation. Henry will be waking up soon, and Jordan will need me to watch him while he visits Amy. Now that I know where he goes, now that I understand what he’s dealing with, everything feels different.
I take extra care getting ready this morning, choosing a soft blue sweater that brings out my eyes and making sure my hair falls just right. Not obvious, but presentable. Like someone who’s ready to have an important conversation.
And like someone who’s ready to finally trust again.
“I’m going over to Jordan’s,” I call to Ash as I grab my keys. “You okay here for a bit? I’ll bring Henry back. “
“Yep!” he calls back without taking his eyes off the screen. “I’m about to beat this level.”
The walk across our yards feels longer than usual, and I realize my hands are slightly shaky as I knock on Jordan’s front door. This is it. We’re going to talk about what happened last night, about what it means, about where we go from here.
Jordan opens the door, and immediately I can tell something’s wrong. His expression is polite but distant, professional in a way that makes my stomach drop.
“Good morning,” he says, stepping aside to let me in. “Thanks for coming over. Henry’s just finishing his bottle.”
“Jordan, about last night?—”
“Actually, I need to apologize for that.” He cuts me off, his voice carefully neutral. “I shouldn’t have shared so much personal information. And I definitely shouldn’t have put you in such an uncomfortable position.”
Uncomfortable position. Is that what he thinks almost kissing me was?
“You didn’t put me in any?—”
“I did.” He’s not looking at me, instead focusing on gathering Henry’s things, checking the bag twice, three times. “You work for me, Alexa. That creates a power dynamic that makes any kind of personal relationship inappropriate. I should have been more mindful of that.”
The words hit me like a slap.Power dynamic. Inappropriate. Professional boundaries. All the clinical language people use when they want to put distance between themselves and something messy.
“I see,” I manage, hoping my voice sounds steadier than it feels.
“I value what we have here. You’re incredible with Henry, and Ash has become important to me. I don’t want to jeopardize that by crossing lines we shouldn’t.”
Right. Because heaven forbid he might actually feel something for the woman who’s been helping him hold his life together for the past three weeks.
