“Yeah, I think the night of the gala. We gave up on having children years ago, and just when we decided to foster another little one, I found out I was pregnant. It’s our little miracle,” she says, cupping her belly. Dad and Poppy congratulate Chuck with hearty slaps on the shoulder, but when Chuck pulls away, he looks confused.
“Well, if you hadn’t said anything, why were we talking about babies?” Everyone’s eyes swing back to my sister who sheepishly waves a hand.
“Me.”
The group gets back on track, and suddenly we’re surrounded by people wanting to wish Harlow, Jaxon, and all of the guys congratulations.
Once everyone crowds into the same corner of the yard, it’s all too much for me. The itch becomes an out of control throbbing, and I start to feel sick and anxious. Stumbling away, I hurry back inside and up to my room to catch my breath, only for a moment. Not even the happy news is enough to distract me from my insecurities.
I slam the door behind me and go straight into my bathroom. Twisting on the cold water, I cup my hands beneath the stream, letting it pool before splashing my face. It doesn’t help, and I find myself in my room, pacing back and forth, trying to slow my breathing while I wring my hands in agitation.
“Come on, Jacinta. Everything is fine. It’s all family downstairs. They don’t want anything from you. They don’t need you for anything, and they love and accept you for who you are, not what you can do for them. Snap out of it, bitch.”
I grab my cell and call my therapist, scheduling an appointment for this week. It’s time I spoke to someone about what happened. I can’t go on like this. It’s not fair to anyone.
Once that’s done, I breathe a sigh of relief. Okay, one step forward. It’s a small step, but it’s a good one. I cross over to the window and look down again. The grill is no longer manned, so I’m assuming lunch is being served, which means I need to go back downstairs.
The thought of this makes goosebumps rise across my skin, so I scratch at them while I contemplate my next move. If I don’t go down, they’re going to know something is wrong. Before the kidnapping, I could fake it until I made it, the consummate actress putting on a smile to show the world I was fine. Now, I just don’t care enough. All of that superficial shit means nothing to me. It’s fake, an act, and not how I want to live my life.
But my family can see right through all of that anyway. How the fuck am I going to hide this from them? They don’t need to be worrying about me. Harlow and my brothers have enough stress on their plates with the zoo, Veronica, and now Harlow’s pregnancy!
Again, my eyes drift to where I’m keeping the coke. Okay, one more hit, just to get me through lunch. People should start leaving after that, and I’ll be okay once everyone is gone. I rush through the process, making two lines in the hope that the feeling will last longer. A noise on the stairs has me scrambling to put everything back in the drawer and wipe my nose with my hand.
“Hey, is everything okay?” Harlow’s frowning when she walks in carrying a bag. “Are you upset about the baby news?” She sounds small and unsure, and I feel like the biggest bitch in the world, but I also don’t know how to explain why I’m up here. But then her bag gives me an idea.
“No! I’m thrilled with the baby news. I can’t wait to meet my niece or nephew, or maybe both. I mean, Jaxon and Iaretwins.” I grab her and hug her again before pulling away. Her mouth is open in shock, so I guess she hadn’t considered that yet. I start to chuckle before going over to my closet.
“No, I came up here because I remembered your gift,” I tell her, going into it and bringing out a bag.
She recovers from her shock and sits down on the bed, smiling. “Oh, good, because I have this for you. If you had waited until I’d given it to you, you would have found out about the baby then.” She holds out the bag, and we do a swap. I’m excited to see what’s in mine, and when I pull out the clothes that are in there, I actually cackle. Harlow has given me three auntie-themed shirts.
One of them says,Auntitude. If you don’t know what that is, mess with my niece or nephew and find out.The other one says,Fuantie. The fun aunt, cooler than Mom. Professional advice giver, expert storyteller, spoiler of children, best person in the whole world.Then the last one is a shirt with a matching baby onesie.Mine says,Aunt with all the sass,and the onesie says,I get my sass from my aunt.
Then there’s a baby-sized T-shirt that has two pictures on it. There’s a wooden rocking horse with the wordsYour auntover it, while the other picture features a dabbing rainbow unicorn. Above the second photo, it says,My aunt.
“I fucking love them, and I can’t wait to wear them. My niece and whatever that is in your belly are going to be the most spoiled and loved babies in the world.” I can’t stop the tears of joy from forming in my eyes. I grab her around the neck and pull her to me, hugging her hard. “I love you so much. I’m so sorry I was such a fucking bitch to you. Please forgive me,” I ask her, a little sob sneaking out.
“Hey, hey! What’s all this? That’s water under the bridge. We’re solid, and I love you too. What brought all this on?” She pushes me back and looks at me closely. Shit!
“Oh, nothing, just feeling a little emotional. My twin is going to be a daddy. I just can’t believe it!” I practically jump off the bed and into my bathroom. That won’t make me look any more normal, but I need to keep her from staring at my pupils. Splashing water on my face, I get my shit together, and when I come back out, Harlow has lost the worried look. She’s smiling like she doesn’t have a care in the world which is a nice change. She seems to be embracing this Earth goddess mother thing already.
“Yeah, we’re all kind of still floating on shock and surprise. I mean, who would have thought Peter’s crazy ass scheme would work? I’m sure once reality hits us and we realize we’re going to have two babies under one roof as well as trying to get the zoo up and running, everyone will go into freak out mode. Well, maybe not Kai. He’s already in Daddy mode, so maybe he’ll hold us all together.”
We’re both chuckling by the time she finishes, because she’s not wrong. It’s certainly going to be fun in their house for a while.
I point to the other bag. “Open mine! It’s not much, since the guys kind of stole all the thunder with your gifts this year.”
She pulls out the gorgeous leather halter that I had gotten for her new horse and the monogrammed grooming set. “Just a little something for the other new addition in your life.”
“Thank you! They’re gorgeous.” Her eyes are bright with happiness, and she gives me another hug.
“Well, come on. Let’s go downstairs. I’m sure everyone will be looking for us if they have to wait much longer.” I leave my bag on my bed, but she brings hers with us and puts it by the table in the foyer.
“So, how was last night?” she asks as she tucks my arm into hers. We walk down the corridor together, which gives me a little wiggle of warmth. It’s silly, but this is a little moment of sisterhood, something I hadn’t realized I needed.
“Ah, yeah, it was fun. Hope and I drank too much and danced for hours,” I say, leaving out the Batman detail. She doesn’t need to hear about the hot as fuck and equally mortifying experience.
Before Harlow can respond, we make it back outside where a long stretch of tables and chairs have been set up, the former piled with copious amounts of food. A couple of hired staff members are bustling around, directed by Mrs. Heyton.
